Misc SMS Jokes / Text Messages

How to settle abroad?

For Boys:
Study hard
Get good grades
Appear in ielts n toefl
Apply for student visa
Wait for the call
Appear in the interview
Get admission in a university
Get good grades
Search for a job
Work hard, earn well to settle

For Girls:
Marry this guy

Positive-thinking poem:

Little bird in the sky
Droping shit into ur eye

U don't worry u don't cry,
U just thank God that,

Cows do not fly

Always b positive

Funny Truth-

No one is as ugly as their driving license/ identity card picture,

nor as good-looking as their facebook profile pic..! :D ;)

The best feature of iPhone 6 is
that if you hold it upside down
it becomes iPhone 9.

1 larki ki dua

Kasam se her larkay ko bhula dungi,
Sab hi ki tasveerain jala dungi,

Ek tum hi raho gay is dil main,
Balance dalwa do tumhe dua dungi,

Lab pai aati hai dua ban k tamanna meri,
zindagi bomb sai ho mehfoz khudaya meri!

Main jo daftar k liye ghar se nikal ker jaon,
Roz marrah ki tarha khair se wapas aaon!

Na koi bomb k dhamakay se uradaye mujh ko,
muft main jaam-e-shahadat na pila de mujh ko!

Jo urdaday mujhay khudkash to doain dunga,
bay wazu hokay chacha bush ko doain donga !

Biwi bachon ko meri jan ki qeemat mil jai,
bethay bethay meray ghar walon ko daulat mil jaye!

Hain jin logon se kal tak thee watan ki zenat,
aaj woh log hoay qabar-o-kafan ki zenat !

Ghar mera hogaya viranay ki soorut yarab,
Aur badli na kisi thanay ki soorat yaarab !

In pai jaiz hai zabardasti hukumat karna,
Aur hai jurm mujhey apne hifazat karna!

Rozi hum sub ki bacha roz ki hartalon sai
Jan aur maal ho mefoz police walon sai!

Jub na schol khulain gay to perhain gay kaisay,
Aur zinda na rahaingay to barhaingay kaisay !

LOVE YOUR HUSBAND

When he orders you to make tea or coffee.
He wants to feel fresh to listen to your nostop talks.

Love him if he looks at all the beautiful females.
He is just checking that you are still the best.

Love him if he criticize your cooking.
He is still improving his taste.

Love him if he snores at night and disturbs your sleep.
He is trying to prove that he is the most relaxed person after being married to you.

Love him if forgets to give you a gift on your birthday.
He is saving money for future.

Love him Because...
You don't have a Choice...
and killing is a legal offense

Tell someone you love them today,
because life is short.

But

Shout it at them in German,
because life is also terrifying and confusing