Asking questions Quote by Jonathan Berent

““ Keeping it Going Asking questions may be the best way of keeping a conversation going. Not only can you express interest in what is being said, but you also demonstrate a continued desire to get to know the other person. Asking questions to find areas of common interest is somewhat like fishing: You throw out a line more times than you get a bite. So keep asking open-ended questions until you find an area that seems of interest to that person. Then, express your own interest or curiosity. There are two types of questions, and a combination of both will serve you best. 1. Closed-ended: “Yes.” “No.” “True.” “False.” These are dead-end answers—a one- or two-word reply that probably leads nowhere. A question such as “Where are you from?” can be closed-ended if the person answers with the place name only. Follow up with an open-ended question, and you may save the conversation. But asking too many closed-ended questions in a row will seem like interrogation. Balance the conversation out with a variety of questions and comments, and you will discover greater interest and depth. 2. Open-ended: Open-ended questions are like essay questions—they promote thoughtful answers of several sentences, not just one or two words. Such questions include: “How?” “Why?” “In what way?” When you ask the questions, you have control in the conversation. Don’t waste the opportunity by asking general questions such as “What’s new?” or “Tell me about yourself.” Be specific. Of course, asking open-ended questions takes practice. Use the guidelines throughout this chapter to develop topics of interest between you.””

— Jonathan Berent