"The (Supreme Court) ruling that anyone who's arrested……" — Jon Stewart
"The (Supreme Court) ruling that anyone who's arrested -- even accidentally -- can be strip-searched was decided five to four, with the votes for the searches coming from the Court's five conservatives. You know -- the 'defending personal liberty' guys. Which is weird because I'm not a constitutional scholar, but I'm willing to bet Big Government feels it's biggest when it's inside your anus."
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Jon Stewart
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230 Quotes by Jon Stewart
Jon Stewart has 230 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Christmas and the New Year are actually two holidays. So there is a plural, which in the English language, necessitates…
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I'm doing everything I can to sabotage my career. It's a little thing called "fear of success".
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The unfortunate, yet truly exciting thing about your life, is that there is no core curriculum. The entire place is…
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Love what you do. Get good at it. Competence is a rare commodity in this day and age. And let…
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Bad jokes and gay marriage are destroying this country. But torture can save it.
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Don't confuse [Father's Day] with Valentine's Day, and here's why. Boy, will you creep him out. I can just tell…
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Why can't they have gay people in the army? Personally, I think they are just afraid of a thousand guys…
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I want to look back on my career and be proud of the work, and be proud that I tried…
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The last thing we'll hear is some scientist saying 'It works!'
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Is listening to Pink Floyd in the dark a medical condition?
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I've always run by the hierarchy of 'If not funny, interesting. If not interesting, hot. If not hot, bizarre. If…
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A guy comes down to earth, takes your sins, dies, and comes back three days later. You believe in him…
See all 230 quotes by Jon Stewart »
More Accidentally Quotes
This quote is filed under Accidentally Quotes,
one of 262 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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In 1945 J.A. Ratcliffe ... suggested that I [join his group at Cavendish Laboratory, Cambridge] to start an investigation of…
— Martin Ryle
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The true genius is a mind of large general powers, accidentally determined to some particular direction.
— Samuel Johnson
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There's more to be learned here [St. Andrews] about course design than anywhere. Collection bunkers, false fronts, bump shots. The…
— Jack Nicklaus
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Viktor Petrenko and I met at a competition, where I beat him completely accidentally. I felt so embarrassed in front…
— Evgeni Plushenko
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If I hurt someone, if I were to accidentally poke someone's eye out, I would laugh. And then I'd say,…
— Rachel McAdams
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For exactly the same reason, it is sometimes satisfying to cut yourself and bleed. On those gray [sic] days where…
— Augusten Burroughs
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Would it not be strange if a universe without purpose accidentally created humans who are so obsessed with purpose?
— John Templeton
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Ever heard the story about a cat that accidentally caught a mouse in his sleep? Me neither
— Mike Murdock
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Whether deliberately, unconsciously or accidentally, she seems to have composed her own life so that its fitful, rudderless, and self-doubting…
— Carolyn Heilbrun
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For me songwriting is very...it's almost like an accident. 'Oh I accidentally wrote about that.' I sit down with the…
— Unknown Author
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When I was 23, 24, I used to have a really bad runny nose, mucus, tons of acne, reddishness all…
— Woody Harrelson
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I started in radio, again accidentally. I wasn't looking for this kind of work at all.
— Hector Elizondo
See all 262 Accidentally Quotes »