"I realize how desperate it sounds for me,……" — John Oliver
"I realize how desperate it sounds for me, as a comedian, to ask you to laugh at my jokes."
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John Oliver
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98 Quotes by John Oliver
John Oliver has 98 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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I think the best analogy for where we are right now is that America is Elvis Presley -- the most…
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Congratulations, Congress! 77% disapproval rating! You may be about to become the English language's most offensive C-word.
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Sarah Palin has been hired back by Fox News, and she only left five months ago. She has now effectively…
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Mr. President, no one is saying you broke any laws, we're just saying it's a little bit weird you didn't…
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Wow. Losing 95 percent of your audience in just five years. That basically makes Obama the NBC of presidents.
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News is not a game show. You don't win a car if you happen to be right.
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Welcome to The Daily Show, I'm John Oliver. Jon Stewart is still not here. He is currently living out a…
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Whatever the occasion, [the Queen] has a face which demonstrably says 'I don't give a royal s**t.'
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Believe it or not the war on Iraq is based on a sound scientific principle, The bee hive principle. Which…
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If you’ve been here, in New York, it has been dominated by the UN General Assembly, the annual event where…
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You know that things are not going well when you lose the moral high ground to a TMZ reporter,
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One thing that America is objectively exceptional at is overreacting whenever anyone accuses them of not being exceptional.
See all 98 quotes by John Oliver »
More Ask Quotes
This quote is filed under Ask Quotes,
one of 8,438 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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We must no more ask whether the soul and body are one than ask whether the wax and the figure…
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Ask yourself the secret of your success. Listen to your answer, and practice it.
— Richard Bach
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If journalists ask you again and again about the same bands, you'll end up saying you hate them just because…
— Billie Joe Armstrong
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If you have to ask what jazz is, you'll never know.
— Louis Armstrong
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I began wearing hats as a young lawyer because it helped me to establish my professional identity. Before that, whenever…
— Bella Abzug
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I could be on 52nd and Third in Manhattan up and ask a strange for directions and they will help…
— Rodney Atkins
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To save your world you asked this man to die; would this man, could he see you now, ask why?
— Wystan Hugh Auden
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Before people complain of the obscurity of modern poetry, they should first examine their consciences and ask themselves with how…
— Wystan Hugh Auden
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If two friends ask you to judge a dispute, don't accept, because you will lose one friend; on the other…
— Saint Augustine
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It is happy for you that you possess the talent of flattering with delicacy. May I ask whether these pleasing…
— Jane Austen
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The Holy Spirit is our comforter, our teacher. That's why, in prayer, we can ask the Lord to open up…
— Michele Bachmann
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I'm not an actor that tends to care. I don't ask 'Is this a close up? Is this a master?…
— Christian Bale
See all 8,438 Ask Quotes »