"Sometimes when I'm driving behind a big cement……" — Jack Handey

"Sometimes when I'm driving behind a big cement truck, I think of how the valve on the truck could suddenly open, spilling cement over my car, encasing me inside and leaving me to slowly fall into an oxygen-deprived coma, from which I awaken five years later to find my wife remarried to my best friend. But then I think maybe I'm just being paranoid, because what are the odds of *that* happening again?"

— Jack Handey

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397 Quotes by Jack Handey

Jack Handey has 397 quotes on this site. A few more worth reading:

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