"I'd like to be buried Indian-style, where they……" — Jack Handey
"I'd like to be buried Indian-style, where they put you up on a high rack, above the ground. That way, you could get hit by meteorites and not even feel it."
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Jack Handey
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397 Quotes by Jack Handey
Jack Handey has 397 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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If any man says he hates war more than I do, he better have a knife, that's all I have…
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I hope that after I die, people will say of me: 'That guy sure owed me a lot of money.'
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People think it would be fun to be a bird because you could fly. But they forget the negative side,…
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The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
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I guess of all my uncles, I liked Uncle Caveman the best. We called him Uncle Caveman because he lived…
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If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater, because then people would sing about me…
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Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's…
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What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds singing and the wind rustling through the leaves, that…
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Not screaming in terror like his passengers.
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Somebody told me it was frightening how much topsoil we are losing each year, but I told that story around…
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MEMORIES OF MY FAMILY MEETINGS still are a source of strength to me. I remember we'd all get into the…
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I BET WHEN NEANDERTHAL KIDS would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick heavy…
See all 397 quotes by Jack Handey »
More Buried Quotes
This quote is filed under Buried Quotes,
one of 718 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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As we all know, many people remain buried under tons of rubble and debris, waiting to be rescued. When we…
— Jean-Bertrand Aristide
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I have led an unusual life. I have buried a father killed at age 50 and two brothers killed in…
— Benazir Bhutto
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Once you get a spice in your home, you have it forever. Women never throw out spices. The Egyptians were…
— Erma Bombeck
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I just like making people laugh, and buried in that I like to bring up topics and start discussions.
— Albert Brooks
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My music had roots which I'd dug up from my own childhood, musical roots buried in the darkest soil.
— Ray Charles
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I never heard of an old man forgetting where he had buried his money! Old people remember what interests them:…
— Marcus Tullius Cicero
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They say I was a bad Batman, that it was my fault, that I buried the franchise. But the truth…
— George Clooney
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Hurried and worried until we're buried, and there's no curtain call, Lifes a very funny proposition after all.
— George M. Cohan
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Should we cry when the pope dies, my request we should cry if they cried when we buried Malcom X
— Tupac Shakur
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Like buried treasures, the outposts of the universe have beckoned to the adventurous from immemorial times. Princes and potentates, political…
— George Ellery Hale
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Sometimes when we're feeling sad, it's important just to feel the sadness. Like a snake shedding its skin, old feelings…
— Marianne Williamson
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Here was buried Thomas Jefferson, author of the Declaration of American Independence, of the statute of Virginia for religious freedom,…
— Thomas Jefferson
See all 718 Buried Quotes »