"Happiness is not a circus clown rolling around……" — Jack Handey
"Happiness is not a circus clown rolling around in a big tractor tire so that his arms and legs form 'spokes.' Happiness is when he stops."
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Jack Handey
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397 Quotes by Jack Handey
Jack Handey has 397 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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If any man says he hates war more than I do, he better have a knife, that's all I have…
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I hope that after I die, people will say of me: 'That guy sure owed me a lot of money.'
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People think it would be fun to be a bird because you could fly. But they forget the negative side,…
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The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
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I guess of all my uncles, I liked Uncle Caveman the best. We called him Uncle Caveman because he lived…
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If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater, because then people would sing about me…
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Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's…
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What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds singing and the wind rustling through the leaves, that…
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Not screaming in terror like his passengers.
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Somebody told me it was frightening how much topsoil we are losing each year, but I told that story around…
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MEMORIES OF MY FAMILY MEETINGS still are a source of strength to me. I remember we'd all get into the…
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I BET WHEN NEANDERTHAL KIDS would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick heavy…
See all 397 quotes by Jack Handey »
More Arms Quotes
This quote is filed under Arms Quotes,
one of 3,936 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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When you care about human beings, you do your best to not repress and to not let people to repress…
— Jean-Bertrand Aristide
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Both oligarch and tyrant mistrust the people, and therefore deprive them of their arms.
— Aristotle
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A system is in equilibrium when the forces constituting it are arranged in such a way as to compensate each…
— Rudolf Arnheim
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Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason…
— Marcus Aurelius
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I feel more comfortable when I'm lighter - I sleep better, I snore less, I have more endurance when I…
— Tyra Banks
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These flowers, which were splendid and sprightly, waking in the dawn of the morning, in the evening will be a…
— Pedro Calderon de la Barca
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Despite two decisions, in 2008 and 2010, by the U.S. Supreme Court unequivocally affirming that the Second Amendment to the…
— Bob Barr
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When archaeologists discover the missing arms of Venus de Milo, they will find she was wearing boxing gloves.
— John Barrymore
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A ball had passed between my body and the right arm which supported him, cutting through the sleeve and passing…
— Clara Barton
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The dance can reveal everything mysterious that is hidden in music, and it has the additional merit of being human…
— Charles Baudelaire
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For the theatre one needs long arms... an artiste with short arms can never make a fine gesture.
— Sarah Bernhardt
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The arms race is worse than it ever was, the dumping of creation down a military rat hole is worse…
— Daniel Berrigan
See all 3,936 Arms Quotes »