"For mad scientists who keep brains in jars,……" — Jack Handey
"For mad scientists who keep brains in jars, here's a tip: Why not add a slice of lemon to each jar, for freshness."
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Jack Handey
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397 Quotes by Jack Handey
Jack Handey has 397 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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If any man says he hates war more than I do, he better have a knife, that's all I have…
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I hope that after I die, people will say of me: 'That guy sure owed me a lot of money.'
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People think it would be fun to be a bird because you could fly. But they forget the negative side,…
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The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
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I guess of all my uncles, I liked Uncle Caveman the best. We called him Uncle Caveman because he lived…
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If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater, because then people would sing about me…
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Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's…
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What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds singing and the wind rustling through the leaves, that…
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Not screaming in terror like his passengers.
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Somebody told me it was frightening how much topsoil we are losing each year, but I told that story around…
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MEMORIES OF MY FAMILY MEETINGS still are a source of strength to me. I remember we'd all get into the…
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I BET WHEN NEANDERTHAL KIDS would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick heavy…
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More Add Quotes
This quote is filed under Add Quotes,
one of 1,898 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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There's no lack of writers writing novels in America, about America. Therefore, it seems to me it would be wasteful…
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To give real service you must add something which cannot be bought or measured with money, and that is sincerity…
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For horror movies, color is reassuring because, at least in older films, it adds to the fakey-ness.
— Lynda Barry
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Passion is what adds so much value to life. And if you think about the things that you do, there's…
— Mario Batali
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I don't tend to do much with my lips. My lips are naturally very pink, so if I add any…
— Kate Beckinsale
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My mantra is: put your brain into gear and if you can add to what's on the screen then do…
— Richie Benaud
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You will obtain a vision of matter that is perhaps fatiguing for your imagination, but pure and stripped of what…
— Henri Bergson
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In Mexico we have a trick - add a crystal of salt to the kettle and the tea tastes better,…
— Gael Garcia Bernal
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Color does not add a pleasant quality to design - it reinforces it.
— Pierre Bonnard
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I'm an instant star. Just add water and stir.
— David Bowie
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We have fought for social justice. We have fought for economic justice. We have fought for environmental justice. We have…
— Barbara Boxer
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I tend to think the world is a bit of a miserable place, so anyone who can add to people's…
— Jo Brand
See all 1,898 Add Quotes »