Hard Quote by Greg Fitzsimmons

“I have to stop watching the Olympics. It just reminds me that I forgot to try really hard at something.” quote by Greg Fitzsimmons — Download Open image

“I have to stop watching the Olympics. It just reminds me that I forgot to try really hard at something.”

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Hard Olympics Trying

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The most interesting nerds are the ones who take offense to being called nerds.

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The best drunks are the ones who only hang out with other drunks in places we all know are filled with drunks.

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I enjoy writing the same way I enjoy doing standup. Part of the challenge is being creative and making it work no matter what…

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They say no one knows if we all see red the same way. Except traffic cops.

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I'm kinda stuck in that awkward in-between stage where my hair is just starting to fall out, but I'm still maintaining my youthful acne.

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Trickle-down economics - it didn't work. The whole idea was supply-side economics: give rich people a lot of money; they'll spend it, it'll go into the economy. Here's what we found out - rich people, really good at keeping all the money. That's how they got rich. If you want it in the economy, give it to the poor people.…

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When a banana gets rotten people love to tell you that you can make banana bread out of it. I have never seen anyone…

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My dad was in radio; he was a broadcaster, and it was in the family. He hosted kind of a game show at one…

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Don't be like me. Look at me: monogamous, in shape, no debt, sober... I'm dead inside.

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If you want to find guys with small penises, go to the Hummer dealership.

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Explore all 54 Greg Fitzsimmons quotes

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High school, going into my junior year, I kind of had the idea I was going to be the starting running back. I was a little smaller, so I decided to gain weight and try to get faster. I wasn't a fan of the weight room. I thought just the God-given talent would take you where you needed to go.…

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