Best Humour Qoutes

554 Humour quotes by 412 unique authors

TELESCOPE, n. A device having a relation to the eye similar to that of the telephone to the ear, enabling distant objects to plague us… — Ambrose Bierce
Wit is an intermittent fountain; kindness is a perennial spring. — Marie von Ebner-Eschenbach
The cause of laughter is simply the sudden perception of the incongruity between a concept and the real project. — Arthur Schopenhauer
Think of what would happen to us... if there were no humorists; life would be one long Congressional Record. — Thomas Lansing Masson
HELPED are those who laugh with a pure heart; theirs will be the company of the jolly righteous. — Alice Walker
Is not the decisive difference between comedy and tragedy that tragedy denies us another chance? — John Updike
Laughter is more serious than tears. — Toni Morrison
A story, in which native humour reigns, Is often useful, always entertains; A graver fact, enlisted on your side, May furnish illustration, well applied; But… — William Cowper
The comedy gods are smiling on me tonight... — Bill Maher
It was a dangerous profession I had chosen ... because no one likes a funny kid. In fact, adults are scared silly of them and… — Art Buchwald
Any man will admit if need be that his sight is not good, or that he cannot swim or shoots badly with a rifle, but… — Stephen Leacock
Laughter allows us to get past the fear of death. — Deepak Chopra
My father used to brag that I wasn't a ham, I was the whole pig. — Jim Carrey
It is sometimes forgotten how much wit there is in certain works of abstract art. There is a certain point in undergoing anguish when one… — Robert Motherwell
Temporary madness may be necessary in some cases, to cleanse and renovate the mind; just as a fit of illness is to carry off the… — Augustus William Hare
I had placed my stick on the table, as I do every evening. It had been specially made to suit my height, to enable me… — Henri de Toulouse-Lautrec
All of us have schnozzles... if not in our faces, then in our character, minds or habits. When we admit our schnozzles, instead of defending… — Jimmy Durante
All humor is rooted in pain. — Richard Pryor
The owl and the pussycat went to sea, / In a beautiful pea green boat. / They took some honey, and plenty of money, /… — Edward Lear
The ability to laugh at life is right at the top, with love and communication, in the hierarchy of our needs. Humour has much to… — Sara Davidson
Laughter is an independent, tremendously important, and lurid emotion. — Wyndham Lewis
The more ignoble I find life, the more strongly I react by contradiction, in humour and in an outburst of liberty and expansion. — Joan Miro
A comedian can only last till he either takes himself serious or his audience takes him serious. — Will Rogers
The whole [Scotch] nation hitherto has been void of wit and humour, and even incapable of relishing it. — Horace Walpole
Days of Dutch courage, just three French letters, and a German sense of humour. — Elvis Costello

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412 authors contributed a total of 554 Humour Quotes, led by these top contributors:

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