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Humour Quotes by Pacifiersucker
- The only reason Why people going to watch Titanic 3D is Because of The Painting scene....
- Facebook is now like home. If you don't come back in 24 hours it means you are either lost, dead, sick or had an accident...
- Math and alcohol don't mix. Please don't drink and derive.
- My definition of home is... Home is the place where you can scratch exactly where it itches.
- Confusions in life: Why is the word ABBREVIATION too long? If a TURTLE loses his shell, is it Naked or Homeless? If OLIVE OIL comes…
- It's funny when people discuss over 'love marriage' and 'arranged marriage' It is like asking a person if he would like to 'hang himself' or…
- A WISE MAN washes his hand after he PEES. But, A WISER MAN Doesn't PEE On his hand ...
- The Worst Thing About Censorship Is... [ Deleted By Censorship Bureau ]
- Come like a Horse, Sit like a Thief, And Go like a King.... This Slogan was written on a.. Public Toilet Door.
- A perfect girl Doesn't bother, Doesn't shout, Doesn't flirt with others, Doesn't lies, Doesn't cheat, . . . And . . Doesn't exists?
- What A Mystery! A cockroach is afraid of the Rat. Rat is afraid of Cat. The cat is afraid of the dog/ The dog is…
- Do you know that GRAVITY Is stronger at morning? It is proven in the fact, It's so hard to get up from the Bed.
- Dear Bird, What the hell are you Always so happy about at four In The Morning... ? Sincerely, Shut Up, Am trying To Sleep... =P…
- Dear Human; You Get Angry At Me, If I wake you up... You Also Get Angry, If I don't..!! What The Hell Is This??? -Sincerely.…
- You're So Sad, Maybe You should Buy A 'Happy Meal.'
- We Can Be Like Mc Donalds and Burger King; I'll Have It My Way, And You'll Be Lovin' It.
- Old People At Weddings Always Poke Me And Say 'YOU'RE NEXT' So, I Started Joking, Doing The Same Thing To Them At The Funerals.
- The Awkward Moment When The Teacher Cracks A Joke In The Class And Nobody Laughs...
- With The Great Power, Comes Huge Electricity Bill!
- That Awkward Moment When It's Quiet In Class And Your Stomach Decides To Make That Dying Whale Sound.
- It Doesn't Matter How Hard Or Bad Ass You Are... When A Toddler Hands You Their Ringing Toy Cell Phone, You'll Still Answer It.
- Diapers And Politicians Should Be Changed Often Both For The Same Reason. Makes Perfect Sense.
- No Offense Means, I'm About To Insult You, But Dont Get Mad.
- Dear Yahoo, I've Never Heard Anyone Say, 'I Don't Know, Let's Yahoo It!' Sincerely Yours, Google
- The 7 Funniest Contradictory Words: 1. Clearly Misunderstood, 2. Exact Estimate, 3. Small Crowd, 4. Act Naturally, 5. Found Missing, 6. Fully Empty, 7. Happily…
More Humour Quotes
- That which has not a real excellency and value in it self, entertains no longer than the giddy Humour which recommended it… — Mary Astell
- Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. — Dave Barry
- The people I grew up around who I really liked were quick on the draw. It always just wowed me. And my… — Drew Barrymore
- If someone had told me years ago that sharing a sense of humour was so vital to partnerships, I could have avoided… — Kate Beckinsale
- Among all kinds of Writing, there is none in which Authors are more apt to miscarry than in Works of Humour, as… — Joseph Addison
- Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake… — Ambrose Bierce
- I think the key attributes for a good speaker are someone that's articulate and someone that puts a fair amount of humour… — Jo Brand
- The real problem you get with humour is that you only have so many kinds of jokes within you, and you mine… — Bill Bryson
- Some say that Cusk has no sense of humour, but expecting giggles from this writer would be akin to expecting sonnets from… — Julie Burchill
- Life is like playing a violin solo in public and learning the instrument as one goes on. — Samuel Butler
- My wife is way funnier than I am. As much as I don't really feel I share a sense of humour with… — Steve Carell
- I don't know, maybe Australian humour isn't supposed to be funny. It's as dry as the Sahara, and I think people miss… — Nick Cave