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Funny Drinking Quotes by Jim Jefferies
More Funny Drinking Quotes
- I am a drinker with writing problems. — Brendan Behan
- Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony. — Robert Benchley
- Trumpets are a bit more adventurous; they're drunk! Trumpeters are generally drunk. It wets their whistle. — Paul McCartney
- Nobody cares that you're smart and nobody cares that your kids don't have bruises. — Jim Jefferies
- Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. — Kinky Friedman
- I'm taking Viagra and drinking prune juice - I don't know if I'm coming or going. — Rodney Dangerfield
- If I had to live my life over, I'd live over a saloon. — W.C. Fields
- I try not to drink too much because when I'm drunk, I bite. — Bette Midler
- I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass. — David Lee Roth
- Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough. — Mark Twain
- Champagne for my real friends and real pain for my sham friends. — Tom Waits
- I can resist everything except temptation. — Oscar Wilde