For five hundred dollars, I'll name a subatomic particle after you. Some of my satisfied customers include Arthur C. Quark and George… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Awareness is about unlearning. It is the recognition that you don’t know as much as you thought you knew.” — Scott Adams Awareness Copy Share Image
We're a planet of nearly six billion ninnies living in a civilization that was designed by a few thousand amazingly smart deviants. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Skeptics,” he said, “suffer from the skeptics’ disease— the problem of being right too often.” — Scott Adams Skeptics Copy Share Image
I have infinite capacity to do more work as long as you don't mind that my quality approaches zero. — Scott Adams Approach Copy Share Image
In the future, airplanes will be flown by a dog and a pilot. And the dog's job will be to make sure… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Ideas are cheap. A dime a dozen, as they say. It's the implementation that's important! The trick isn't just to have a… — Scott Adams Computer Copy Share Image
Some of my best friends are Venture Capitalists, but let's face it, a hamster with Alzheimer's could make those kind of numbers.… — Scott Adams Alzheimer Copy Share Image
I'm slowly becoming a convert to the principle that you can't motivate people to do things, you can only demotivate them. The… — Scott Adams Leader Copy Share Image
“It is a wondrous human characteristic to be able to slip into and out of idiocy many times a day without noticing… — Scott Adams Change Copy Share Image
Every credible scientist on earth says your products harm the environment. I recommend paying weasels to write articles casting doubt on the… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
I think the pleasure of completed work is what makes blogging so popular. You have to believe most bloggers have few if… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“To be fair to Nietzsche, he probably meant the word 'stronger' to include anything that makes you more capable. I’d ask him… — Scott Adams Dilbert Copy Share Image
Mockery is an important social tool for squelching stupidity. I’ve never seen anyone change his mind because of the power of a… — Scott Adams Acquisition Copy Share Image
I'm slowly becoming a convert to the principle that you can't motivate people to do things, you can only de-motivate them. The… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
If you see voters as rational, you'll be a terrible politician. People are not wired to be rational. Our brains simply evolved… — Scott Adams Alive Copy Share Image
“If you want success, figure out the price, then pay it. It sounds trivial and obvious, but if you unpack the idea… — Scott Adams Success Copy Share Image
“Things that will someday work out well start out well. Things that will never work start out bad and stay that way.” — Scott Adams Failure Copy Share Image
“There’s no denying the importance of practice. The hard part is figuring out what to practice.” — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
When times are bad, the gloves come off and employers are less nice. People become disposable. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Dinosaur: I plan to use punctuated equilibrium to turn this zit into a third eye. Catbert: That's not a natural advantage. You'd… — Scott Adams Advantage Copy Share Image
I try to manage my day by my circadian rhythms because the creativity is such an elusive thing, and I could easily… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Boss: I just heard that light travels faster than sound. I'm wondering if I should shout when I speak, just so my… — Scott Adams Boss Copy Share Image
If I had to pick one quality that best predicts success (other than wanting to be successful) it would be the willingness… — Scott Adams Being successful Copy Share Image
“Good ideas have no value because the world already has too many of them. The market rewards execution, not ideas.” — Scott Adams Execution Copy Share Image
Reporters are faced with the daily choice of painstakingly researching stories or writing whatever people tell them. Both approaches pay the same. — Scott Adams America Copy Share Image
“A good general rule is that people are more influenced by visual persuasion, emotion, repetition, and simplicity than they are by details… — Scott Adams Persuasion Copy Share Image
If there are no stupid questions, then what kind of questions do stupid people ask? Do they get smart just in time… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
Informed decision-making comes from a long tradition of guessing and then blaming others for inadequate results. — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
If your boss gets drunk and offers to photocopy her posterior, do not helpfully suggest pressing reduce 75%. — Scott Adams Boss Copy Share Image
Crackpot is an excellent job because the expectations are so low. No one ever tells crackpots that they should be doing more. — Scott Adams Crackpots Copy Share Image
“Simplification is often the difference between doing something you know you should do and putting it off.” — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“On all the important stuff, we are emotional creatures who make decisions first and rationalize them after the fact.” — Scott Adams Decision making Copy Share Image
“Passion feels very democratic. It is the people’s talent, available to all. It’s also mostly bullshit.” — Scott Adams Passion Copy Share Image
The main difference between marketing and fraud is that criminals have to pay for their own alcohol. — Scott Adams Alcohol Copy Share Image
“One of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever heard goes something like this: If you want success, figure out the price,… — Scott Adams Advice Copy Share Image
Your business clothes are naturally attracted to staining liquids. This attraction is strongest just before an important meeting. — Scott Adams Attraction Copy Share Image
“Our system requires a continuous supply of highly capable people who are so disgruntled with their jobs that they are willing to… — Scott Adams Copy Share Image
“Sometimes what seems to be a difference in opinions is in fact just a difference in definitions.” — Scott Adams Argument Copy Share Image
I had several different bosses during the early years of 'Dilbert.' They were all pretty sure I was mocking someone else. — Scott Adams Boss Copy Share Image
