There is always room at the top - after the investigation. — Oliver Herford Investigation Copy Share Image
Actresses will happen in the best regulated families. — Oliver Herford Accidents happen Copy Share Image
What is my loftiest ambition? I've always wanted to throw an egg at an electric fan. — Oliver Herford Ambition Copy Share Image
When I go abroad I always sail from Boston because it is such a pleasant place to get away from. — Oliver Herford Abroad Copy Share Image
Children, behold the Chimpanzee: He sits on the ancestral tree From which we sprang in ages gone. — Oliver Herford Age Copy Share Image
A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's: She changes it more often. — Oliver Herford Feminism Copy Share Image
Modesty is the gentle art of enhancing your charm by pretending not to be aware of it. — Oliver Herford Art Copy Share Image
Bigamy is one way of avoiding the painful publicity of divorce and the expense of alimony. — Oliver Herford Alimony Copy Share Image
An epicure is one who gets nothing better than the cream of everything but cheerfully makes the best of it. — Oliver Herford Cheerfully Copy Share Image
A kiss is a course of procedure cunningly devised, for the mutual stopage of speech at a moment when words are superfluous. — Oliver Herford Communication Copy Share Image
Some take their gold in minted mold, and some in harps thereafter, but give me mine in bubbles fine and keep the… — Oliver Herford Bubbles Copy Share Image
Song is the licensed medium for bawling in public things too silly or sacred to be uttered in ordinary speech. — Oliver Herford Bawling Copy Share Image
“At evening when the lamp is lit, The tired Human People sit And doze, or turn with solemn looks The speckled pages… — Oliver Herford Cats Copy Share Image
There are more fish taken out of a stream than ever were in it. — Oliver Herford Boat Copy Share Image
Tact: to lie about others as you would have them lie about you. — Oliver Herford Tact Copy Share Image
A pest is a person who can talk like an encyclopedia, and does. — Oliver Herford Doe Copy Share Image
If some people got their rights they would complain of being deprived of their wrongs. — Oliver Herford Complaining Copy Share Image
Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure. — Oliver Herford Drinking Copy Share Image
The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet. — Oliver Herford Comedy Copy Share Image
Cat: a pygmy lion who loves mice, hates dogs, and patronizes human beings. — Oliver Herford Cat Copy Share Image
Darling: the popular form of address used in speaking to a member of the opposite sex whose name you cannot at the… — Oliver Herford Addresses Copy Share Image
To babble is to make a feminine noise somewhat resembling the sound of a brook, but with less meaning. — Oliver Herford Babble Copy Share Image
I heard a bird sing In the dark of December A magical thing And sweet to remember. 'We are nearer to Spring… — Oliver Herford Bird Copy Share Image
A man must love a thing very much if he not only practices it without any hope of fame and money, but… — Oliver Herford Fame Copy Share Image
I sometimes think the Pussy-Willows grey Are Angel Kittens who have lost their way, And every Bulrush on the river bank A… — Oliver Herford Angel Copy Share Image
Gather kittens while you may, Time brings only sorrow; And the kittens of today; Will be old cats tomorrow. — Oliver Herford Cat Copy Share Image
“When I grow up I mean to be A Lion large and fierce to see. I'll mew so loud that Cook in… — Oliver Herford Cats Copy Share Image
The Elf and the Dormouse UNDER a toadstool crept a wee Elf, Out of the rain to shelter himself. Under the toadstool,… — Oliver Herford Bigs Copy Share Image
