Maria Bamford

I feel bad about that, that I worship celebrities... but their moods create weather.

— Maria Bamford

In L.A., a lot of comics live here, but we don't get to spend that much time together because we've got to…

— Maria Bamford

Sometimes I worry I don't want to get married as much as I'd like to be dipped in a vat of warm,…

— Maria Bamford

I'm not an extroverted person, nor am I hyper-confident in my point of view. I just don't have that personality.

— Maria Bamford

I like all kinds of comedy. I like comedy that doesn't talk about real beliefs or serious thoughts, but then I also…

— Maria Bamford

I think I, like a lot of people, have that type of brain where I find it interesting or fulfilling to worry…

— Maria Bamford

I have trouble watching singers because they are so sincere.

— Maria Bamford

Even if you're disgusting, and everyone is creeped out by you and thinks you're gross, you know, keep doing what you love!

— Maria Bamford

Some of my friends and family have tried to challenge me to do jokes that aren't as self-deprecating, where I genuinely express…

— Maria Bamford

I can't stand makeup commercials. 'Do you need a lipstick that keeps your lips kissable?' No, I need a lipstick that gets…

— Maria Bamford

I have a comic character - my sister said that I'm the victim of every joke I tell.

— Maria Bamford

Schizophrenia is hearing voices, not doing voices.

— Maria Bamford

It's always the compliments from people you love that mean so much.

— Maria Bamford

I express things through characters because I have a fear that my own voice is irritating because that's been said to me.

— Maria Bamford

In my stand up, I think I try to be less energetic because I feel embarrassed about how much enthusiasm I have.…

— Maria Bamford

I'm not technically rich, but I do have a lot of s**t that I don't need, that I refuse to share with…

— Maria Bamford

I'm sort of shy, and Twitter feels like chatting all day with a group. I like to follow people. I'm following Joel…

— Maria Bamford

I love that vision-board thing where you cut out pictures that resonate with you so they'll manifest. I've done that since I…

— Maria Bamford

Time flies when you are anxious!

— Maria Bamford

I find it creatively satisfying to write material and say it out loud in a public place, whether or not anyone's listening.

— Maria Bamford

My dad has some depressive issues, and he's really tough on himself. So sometimes he can say things that are not super…

— Maria Bamford

I thought that when you have more success that you'd feel more buoyed or feel more confident. But in fact my brain…

— Maria Bamford

My therapist says I'm afraid of success. I guess I could understand that, because after all, fulfilling my potential would REALLY cut…

— Maria Bamford

The Internet makes everything much less mysterious.

— Maria Bamford

I would've been able to write anything about mental-health crises had I not felt good.

— Maria Bamford