Christmas sits like a black hole on the calendar. Just try scheduling a meeting at work the month of December. — Andrew Shaffer Black hole Copy Share Image
The hottest new attraction at Disney World has got to be the new Last Airbender ride. — Andrew Shaffer Attraction Copy Share Image
“Most times, my mind is just an ongoing, present-tense, first-person monologue. It's like I'm writing a novel, constantly, but only in my… — Andrew Shaffer Monologue Copy Share Image
“The people are so small, they look like ants (although they're Walmart customers, so they look like obese ants).” — Andrew Shaffer Like Ants Copy Share Image
Way before musicians and actors cornered the market on misbehavior, writers were flooding hotel rooms and testing their livers' upper limits. — Andrew Shaffer Hotel Copy Share Image
“Who is this man I’m supposed to interview, this man whose last name is the same as the color of my sweatpants?… — Andrew Shaffer Humor Copy Share Image
The higher a book's sales ranks, the better chances it has of being noticed by Amazon's internal recommendations engine. — Andrew Shaffer Being Copy Share Image
Biden is actually a wonk at heart. Despite his gaffes, he's very cerebral. — Andrew Shaffer Actually Copy Share Image
Universal Orlando may have the new Harry Potter Wizarding World, but Disney World has the Hari Puttar Experience, based on the Bollywood… — Andrew Shaffer Comedy Copy Share Image
I catch Filter in Des Moines doing their soundcheck at a small club. After tearing through a few songs, they spend nearly… — Andrew Shaffer Club Copy Share Image
“No man is an island,” he says. “Islands are made of dirt and rocks and trees. I don’t know any people made… — Andrew Shaffer Island Copy Share Image
If you're looking for a behind-the-scenes rock-n-roll biography, pick up Nikki Sixx's 'The Heroin Diaries'. If you want the world's most narcissistic… — Andrew Shaffer First step Copy Share Image
Celebrating Christmas without subscribing to Christianity is like watching the Super Bowl without watching a regular season game. Some people watch the… — Andrew Shaffer Christianity Copy Share Image
'First Step 2 Forever' is a hardcover, multi-colored monstrosity that clocks in at 240 pages... half of which feature full-page pictures of… — Andrew Shaffer First step Copy Share Image
“ Stop it, girl. There’s no way he’s five-years-old. Or one hundred. He’s probably like every other CEO on the planet: Late… — Andrew Shaffer Humor Copy Share Image
“As I brush my long, brown hair, the girl in the mirror with blue eyes too big for her head stares back… — Andrew Shaffer Brown hair Copy Share Image
In the White House, Obama was driven around in an armored Cadillac limo nicknamed 'The Beast.' In 'Hope Never Dies,' he blows… — Andrew Shaffer Good Copy Share Image
“Mr. Gray,” I mutter. He’s smiling again like the Big Bad Wolf who wants to eat me. And boy, do I want… — Andrew Shaffer Big Bad Wolf Copy Share Image
“For the first time since he showed up in my checkout lane, I let my eyes wander the full length of his… — Andrew Shaffer First time Copy Share Image
“I growl with frustration at my reflection in the mirror. Damn my hair – it’s fifty shades of fucked up. The situation… — Andrew Shaffer Brown hair Copy Share Image
Young adult author Richelle Mead holds the distinction to perhaps be the only author ever to have a book banned... before it… — Andrew Shaffer Adult Copy Share Image
Cremer's 'Nightshade' is a smart blend of romance, action, philosophy, and pagan witchcraft. And, yes, high-schoolers shape-shifting into wolves. — Andrew Shaffer Action Copy Share Image
“I have hobbies," he says, smirking. "Physical pursuits: Base-jumping, hang-gliding, underwater basket-weaving.” — Andrew Shaffer Copy Share Image
Instead of silencing artists, is it possible that antidepressants can actually help them vocalize their creative ambitions? — Andrew Shaffer Actually Copy Share Image
“She hands me a security badge that says VIRGIN. How could she know that I’m a virgin? Is it that obvious? “How… — Andrew Shaffer Cybersecurity Copy Share Image
Everybody has a breaking point. It's tough to ignore the impulse to respond with anger. — Andrew Shaffer Anger Copy Share Image
In their political careers, Obama and Biden faced down lobbyists, Tea Party carpetbaggers, and Washington gridlock. — Andrew Shaffer Down Copy Share Image
Every published writer, myself included, was at one time unpublished. All writers know what rejection feels like. — Andrew Shaffer Like Copy Share Image
You don't want to write the same story again, but people are like 'We want the same story but different.' Well, how… — Andrew Shaffer Again Copy Share Image
In 2009, the American Library Association recorded 460 challenges reported to the Office of Intellectual Freedom. — Andrew Shaffer American Copy Share Image
Chicago is a city built on architecture, and there are plenty of buildings to scale. — Andrew Shaffer Architecture Copy Share Image
Treat haters in your online spaces just the same as you would in the real world. If they're not respectful to you… — Andrew Shaffer Haters Copy Share Image
“He hands me his shopping list and I lead him through the store in search of the items. Duct tape? Plastic wrap?… — Andrew Shaffer Dexter Copy Share Image
It's not always caving to pressure: Sometimes criticism hits close to home; sometimes criticism changes our minds about something we've put out… — Andrew Shaffer Always Copy Share Image
Many non-believers who have entered substance abuse programs have found themselves at odds with the religious overtones prevalent in the recovery industry. — Andrew Shaffer Abuse Copy Share Image
The difficult part of writing about someone you don't admire is that it's easy to demonize them. What you get then is… — Andrew Shaffer Admire Copy Share Image
When Patrick finally broke his silence with 2008's 'Anthems For the Damned' - the first Filter album that he recorded sober -… — Andrew Shaffer Fans Copy Share Image
“We do have funerals for the living," Jill said. "They're called birthday parties.” — Andrew Shaffer Birthday Copy Share Image
I was under the impression that if you've read one vampire series for young adults, you've read them all. — Andrew Shaffer Books Copy Share Image
