All Ambrose Bierce Quotes
- Epitaph: An inscription on a tomb showing that virtues acquired by death have a retroactive effect. Acquired
- NEIGHBOR, n. One whom we are commanded to love as ourselves, and who does all he knows how to make us disobedient. All
- Mad; adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence; not conforming to standards of thought, speech, and action derived by the conformants from study… Action
- PREDESTINATION, n. The doctrine that all things occur according to programme. . . . not be confused with that of foreordination. The difference is great… According
- OWE, v. To have (and to hold) a debt. The word formerly signified not indebtedness, but possession; it meant "own," and in the minds of… Assets
- Insurrection. An unsuccessful revolution; disaffection's failure to substitute misrule for bad government. Bad
- They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid. Cackle
- PERFECTION, n. An imaginary state of quality distinguished from the actual by an element known as excellence; an attribute of the critic. Actual
- RICH, adj. Holding in trust and subject to an accounting the property of the indolent, the incompetent, the unthrifty, the envious and the luckless. Accounting
- OBLIVION, n. Cold storage for high hopes. A place where ambitious authors meet their works without pride and their betters without envy. A dormitory without… Alarm
- ILLUSTRIOUS, adj. Suitably placed for the shafts of malice, envy and detraction. Detraction
- ENVY, n. Emulation adapted to the meanest capacity. Adapted
- A miracle is an act or event out of the order of nature and unaccountable, as beating a normal hand of four kings and an… Ace
- The natural equipment to accomplish some small part of the meaner ambitions distinguishing able men from dead ones. In the last analysis ability is commonly… Ability
- Uncommon extension of the fear of death. Aging
- Take not God's name in vain; select a time when it will have effect. Effect
- A subsidiary Deity designed to catch the overflow and surplus of the world's worship . . . . [H]is master works for the means wherewith… Catch
- PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be… Bases
- Justice is a commodity which in a more or less adulterated condition the State sells to the citizen as a reward for his allegiance, taxes… Adulterated
- The circus a place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women and children acting the fool. Acting
- Advice: The suggestions you give someone else which you hope will work for your benefit. Advice
- WHEAT, n. A cereal from which a tolerably good whisky can be made; . . . also for bread. The French are said to eat… Any
- MYTHOLOGY, n. The body of a primitive people's beliefs concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities and so forth, as distinguished from the true accounts… Accounts
- MONOSYLLABIC, adj. Composed of words of one syllable . . . Commonly Saxon - that is to say, words of a barbarous people destitute of… Any
- SAUCE, n. The one infallible sign of civilization and enlightenment. A people with no sauces has one thousand vices; a people with one sauce has… Accepted