Wife Quotes · Page 104

My wife and I went to a hotel where we got a waterbed. My wife called it the Dead Sea.

— Henny Youngman

My wife is not my best sexual partner, but she's good with the housework.

— Jean-Claude Van Damme

My wife Shirlie was in Wham! when we met, so we were moving in the same circles.

— Martin Kemp

You know you are the love of mi life. Nuh worry cah you are mi wife but Mi haffi have new gyal…

— Vybz Kartel

Im sometimes mistaken as the wife of the chairman. I just laugh it off.

— Patricia A. Woertz

Man you can talk about my wife am not gonna flinch, just know your mom is my side b****! LOL

— DUB$TEPPER

I am a different type of female. I am not your typical wife of a successful man.

— Brandi Rhodes

“O my love, my wife! Death, that hath suck'd the honey of thy breath Hath had no power yet upon thy beauty.”

— William Shakespeare

I asked my wife, 'On a scale of 1 to 10, how do you rate me as a lover?' She said, 'You…

— Rodney Dangerfield

I've got four women in my house - my wife and my three daughters - and I tell you what, it's pretty…

— Ian Holloway

I've been sober for two-and-a-half years, My children are happy. In August, my wife and I will celebrate our fifteenth wedding anniversary.…

— Trey Anastasio

I think husbands and wives should live in separate houses. If there's enough money, the children should live in a third.

— Cloris Leachman

Then, as if that's not enough, then they declare that my wife is Jewish or Serbian. Luckily for me, she never was…

— Franjo Tudjman

My wife and I got to go onstage at a Flaming Lips concert at Webster Hall once. We dressed up like Scientology…

— Bill Hader

It's confusing. I've had so many wives and so many children I don't know which house to go to first on Christmas.

— Mickey Rooney

Dont complain that your wife doesnt make meals like your mother used to make if you dont make money like your father…

— Vikrant Parsai

The English government having determined not to respect my rights as a French citizen and officer, and summoned me before a court…

— Wolfe Tone

I'm not going to tell you I know George W. Bush intimately. I'm not going to tell you we're best friends. I'll…

— Bernie Sanders

I am not and will never again be a young writer, a young homeowner, a young teacher. I was never a young…

— Meghan Daum

The fact that in Mohammedan law every woman must belong to some man as his absolute property - either as a child,…

— Winston Churchill

Even as the church must fear Christ Jesus, so must the wives also fear their husbands. And this inward fear must be…

— John Dod

I'm always fighting either to have a house work with us or to head a house. It's a lifestyle I can totally…

— Kanye West

And there was some trouble with Oliver Cowdery, and whisper said it was relating to a girl then living in his family;…

— Benjamin F. Johnson

Turning the heat up on the red carpet while still looking like a lady isn't as easy as it sounds. Too much…

— Derek Blasberg

There is nothing more dangerous on planet Earth than a black wife.

— Keegan-Michael Key

“Understand, I did not conquer my wife. I won her over. There is a difference.”

— Janell Rhiannon

A husband should tell his wife everything that he is sure she will find out, and before anyone else does.

— Thomas Dewar, 1st Baron Dewar

My wife was delighted with the home I had given her amid the prairies of the far west.

— Buffalo Bill

It is as foolish to make experiments upon the constancy of a friend, as upon the chastity of a wife.

— Samuel Johnson

It drives me nuts how I rely on my wife for everything. I can't imagine a day without her!

— Akshay Kumar

Stealing a man's wife, that's nothing, but stealing his car, that's larceny.

— James M. Cain

My wife accuses me - and she's probably right - that I'm sometimes oversensitive.

— Joe Torre

“God desires that we develop spiritual muscle so we are strong enough to be His kind of wife.”

— Elizabeth George

No married man's ever made up his mind until he's heard what his wife has got to say about it.

— W. Somerset Maugham

The only time a wife listens to her husband is when he’s asleep.

— Chuck Jones

“I never think of policemen's wives; their beauty maddens me like wine.”

— Kyril Bonfiglioli

The secret to a happy marriage? Do whatever your wife tells you. 'Yes, dear.' And breathe.

— Denzel Washington

My wife knows me as Vermin. My mother knows me as Vermin. For all intent and purposes, that's my name.

— Vermin Supreme

Whenever I read the newspaper, I say to myself, 'At least my wife loves me.'

— Bill Gross

I would be looking up from a pool of blood and hearing my wife ask 'How do I reload this thing'.

— Dick Armey