Base eight is just like base ten really, if you're missing two fingers. — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
Counting in octal is just likst counting in decimal--if you don't use your thumbs. — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
If you asked me to write a rock song or a rap song, I couldn't do it because they're not in my… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
Step up and shake the hand Of someone you can't stand, You can tolerate him if you try! — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
I think that if people are having trouble communicating with one another, the least they can do is SHUT UP. — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
Disclaimer: If anyone disagrees with anything I say, I am quite prepared to not only retract it, but also to deny under… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
I find enough mystery in mathematics to satisfy my spiritual needs. I think, for example, that pi is mysterious enough (don't get… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
If you visit American city, You will find it very pretty. Just two things of which you must beware: Don't drink the… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
If I see a movie star in the department store buying something, I'll kind of sidle up and see what they're saying,… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
I find that if you take the various popular song forms to their logical extremes, you can arrive at almost anything from… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
I didn't feel the need for anonymous affection, for people in the dark applauding. To me, it would be like writing a… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
I find that people can pass me on the street who've just seen my picture in the paper and they wouldn't recognize… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
Speaking of love, one problem that recurs more and more frequently these days, in books and plays and movies, is the inability… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
Plagiarize, plagiarize, / Let no man's work evade your eyes, / Remember why the good Lord made your eyes, / Don't shade your eyes,… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
I ache for the touch of your lips dear, but much more for the touch of your whips dear. — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
When someone makes a move Of which we don't approve, Who is it that always intervenes? U.N. and O.A.S., They have their place, I… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
I'm not tempted to write a song about George W. Bush. I couldn't figure out what sort of song I would write. That's the… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
Don't solicit for your sister, it's not nice. Unless you get a good percentage of her price. — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
It is a sobering thought that when Mozart was my age, he had been dead for two years. — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
“I am never forget the day I first meet the great Lobachevsky. In one word he told me secret of success in mathematics: Plagiarize!… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
Counting in octal is just likst counting in decimal--if you don't use your thumbs. — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
Disclaimer: If anyone disagrees with anything I say, I am quite prepared to not only retract it, but also to deny under oath I… — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
I don't want to satirise George Bush and his puppeteers, I want to vaporise them. — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
San Francisco is a city of twenty-something millionaire white kids named Doug. — Tom Lehrer Copy Share Image
