“State your point. If the opposite party doesn't agree, state it harder- with a punch.” — Jennifer Bernard Copy Share Image
“So…we’ll start by boasting, will we? Just like old times! Very well, demigod.” — Rick Riordan Copy Share Image
Humour is essentially a comforter, reconciling us to things as they are in contrast to things as they might be. — Stephen Leacock Copy Share Image
“CLUN (n.) A leg which has gone to sleep and has to be hauled around after you.” — Douglas Adams Copy Share Image
“Scientists never study the important things. Like why some animals seem to have evolved the ability to gloat.” — Joe Hill Copy Share Image
“There are a great many aspects to feline life, but the three most important - the Holy Trinity, if you will -… — Jem Vanston Copy Share Image
“God didn't call me to kill me. He called me to glory and virtue. My body has dropped on His feet to… — Patience Johnson Copy Share Image
“When in court, the primary role of lawyers is not to prove or disprove innocence; unbeknown to almost all lawyers and their… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
“Two minutes worth of signal analysis told me all I needed to know. This station "talks" to the dark matter universe about… — Howard Tayler Copy Share Image
I think that my ideas of the world are that it's random and cruel but kind of quite comical really, and therefore… — Alexei Sayle Copy Share Image
Lavatorial humour is just not my cup of tea. But, having said that, I'm really of the mind that comedy is so… — Ruth Jones Copy Share Image
“The more you say the more people know about you, make it a point that you say the most sense as little… — Morena Baloyi Copy Share Image
“It’s hard to tell sometimes if Etheny’s stories are true, as you will see, so I will lay down the story as… — Skeleton Cat E L Parfitt Copy Share Image
“After a lifetime of soft, easy living in the West, one's buttocks take an awful hammering out here. Backpacking around India is… — Frank Kusy Copy Share Image
“They’d be complaining about having to walk, and screeching at me to ‘do something, Freddy, do something!’” “But what could you do?”… — Anne Gracie Copy Share Image
Laughter is very infectious, and why it should be so is a most interesting neurological problem. But it also has other, more… — Semir Zeki Copy Share Image
“Even the Hindu neighbours had no way of figuring out what the priest recited, though it was in their mother tongue, Marathi.… — Kiran Nagarkar Copy Share Image
“…a waitress came out and plonked in front of each of us a small standard terra-cotta flowerpot in which had been baked… — Bill Bryson Copy Share Image
“You mean that because I have no name I cannot die and that you cannot be held answerable for death even if… — Flann O'Brien Copy Share Image
But my way of writing is rather to think aloud, and follow my own humours, than much to consider who is listening… — Thomas de Quincey Copy Share Image
“Oh be careful! There they go again!" said the old queen as his string broke spilling his balls over the floor… "Stop… — William Burroughs Copy Share Image
“Once I tried to kill myself with a bungee cord. I kept almost dying.” — Steven Wright Copy Share Image
Analysing humour is like dissecting a frog few people are interested, and the frog dies. — Alan Ford Copy Share Image
The qualities I am looking for in Miss Right are intelligence and humour. — Brendan Coyle Copy Share Image
“To write you dreams of fantasy, is to create fantasy in another's dreams.” — Rob Shepherd Copy Share Image
“Always remember rule #6... don't take yourself so damn seriously” — Ben and Rosamund Zander Copy Share Image
“The leader had a beard and was wearing a caftan that looked as if it had been sewn by elves on hash.” — Margaret Atwood Copy Share Image
“Are you saying that the Rebel Alliance were religious terrorists and Yoda was a benefit cheat?” — Dave Turner Copy Share Image
I hope that the kind reader recognises this as a despairing attempt at humour. — Nancy Springer Copy Share Image
“I guess I like things that take time and attention. More worthwhile that way.” — Huntley Fitzpatrick Copy Share Image
“Walking the plank is a Victorian fiction, and I will not have it on my ship!” — George MacDonald Fraser Copy Share Image
“What the hell was she doing on the nonhostage side of a handgun?” — Suzanne Brockmann Copy Share Image
Where I come from people are very deadpan with a dry humour that I suppose rubbed off on me. — Ardal O'Hanlon Copy Share Image
“The average adult has had sex innumerable times more than they have formed an opinion of their own.” — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
