“So it's true what they say about warlocks, then?" Alec gave him a very unpleasant look. " What's true?" "Alexander," said Magnus… — Cassandra Clare Copy Share Image
“There is a crucifix, a few cloves of garlic, a wooden stake, a hammer, a blob of Silly Putty, and a pocketknife.… — Pittacus Lore Copy Share Image
“I’ve been trying to write the perfect book since high school. e results are in a large Rubbermaid tub in my closet.… — Jason W. Freeman Copy Share Image
“You broke through the humor of my little theater and tried to make a mess of it, stabbing with knives and spattering… — Hermann Hesse Copy Share Image
A man turns to the guy next to him who's covered in bandages from head to toe and asks "What happened?". "I… — Frank Carson Copy Share Image
“I never wish I could go back and write more, no. I spent a long, long time trying to write the book… — John Green Copy Share Image
“Kindness is a source of relief to the soul of the giver, creating a sense of fortitude that is incomprehensible to those… — Janvier Chouteu-Chando Copy Share Image
“I stare at him. "Gee, don't feel like you have to sugarcoat it or anything." "Some people need a cold dose of… — D.D. Barant Copy Share Image
“The modern materialist often makes it simply: "Do what you like," and then rushes off to ask his psychoanalyst when he no… — Joy Davidman Copy Share Image
[Robert Smigel] is one of the greatest comedy writers in the last 50 years. "TV Funhouse" and Triumph and all those sketches.He's… — Neal Brennan Copy Share Image
“I like to eat chicken, but I don’t like live chickens. With their feathers and beaks and weird noises and flapping wings.”… — Laura Kreitzer Copy Share Image
Honestly, Think Like a Man was the first romantic comedy that I liked. I'd kind of avoided them for awhile because I… — Michael Ealy Copy Share Image
“My dad: “Emily, this risotto…” My mom: “It’s just delicious.” Gus’s mom: “Oh, thanks. I’d be happy to give you the recipe.”… — John Green Copy Share Image
The fun, joy, and humor dry up in a relationship when one of the partners is swimming in gin. To my way… — Ginger Rogers Copy Share Image
My personal sense of humor is edgy, I would say more cable-like: words you're not allowed to say, ideas that the majority… — Mary Elizabeth Ellis Copy Share Image
People have always been sensitive. There is nothing wrong with being sensitive, it's a nice word. And in comedy, yes you've to… — Sunil Grover Copy Share Image
“Well, boo, how does bacon sound?” “Bacon sounds great, but you can’t call me boo.” “Why not?” “Because you’re not a rapper,… — R.K. Lilley Copy Share Image
“I leaned my head back and closed my eyes. "We're supposed to be celebrating our two-week anniversary tonight." "Uh, news for you,… — Robin Brande Copy Share Image
“Please,” Shallan said to the sphere. “I need you to become fire.” Pattern buzzed, speaking with a new voice, interpreting the sphere’s… — Brandon Sanderson Copy Share Image
I started finding humor in everything. I used to watch a lot of TV, and I finally figured I didn't need to… — Andy Andrews Copy Share Image
“Religion was supposed to be a matter of faith. Gods were not supposed to jump on your desk and snarl at you.… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
I love comedy. It's something that I think Marvel does so well, and it's one of the reasons I love Marvel so… — Elizabeth Henstridge Copy Share Image
“There was a rare quality about Nurse Grace’s smile. It was the knowledge that sooner or later her smile would inspire some… — Sorin Suciu Copy Share Image
Time will mellow it, make it a moment for laughter. But now it was not funny, now I did not laugh. It… — Daphne du Maurier Copy Share Image
“You took your clothes off?" "You didn't notice?" "No! Jeez Louise, I don't even know you." "If you look under the covers,… — Janet Evanovich Copy Share Image
“Not everyone who talks less or keeps quiet whenever they are with or around you does that because they find you interesting… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
The two biggest sellers in any bookstore are the cookbooks and the diet books. The cookbooks tell you how to prepare the… — Andy Rooney Copy Share Image
“Tied up a lot of women, have you?" He raised one eyebrow, whatever that meant. "A bit odd, are you?" She was… — Judith Ivory Copy Share Image
“As a matter of fact, with all his wit, humor, raillery, persiflage, he was the profoundest logician that ever appealed to the… — Herman E. Kittredge Copy Share Image
“Though she would never admit it to polite Society, Lady Georgette Thorold hated brandy almost as much as she hated husbands. So… — Jennifer McQuiston Copy Share Image
Do as little harm to others as you can; make any sacrifice for your true friends; be responsible for yourself and ask… — Dean Koontz Copy Share Image
“If someone loved you -someone decent and kind that is- you had a responsibility not to trample all over her heart. And… — Julia Quinn Copy Share Image
1,2 the stalker is coming for you. 3,4 better block that whore. 5,6 she's a creeping bitch. 7,8 ain't sure if she straight. 9,10 she's stalking again. — Brii Ann Copy Share Image
“Babies don't come with instruction booklets. You'd learn the same way we all do -- you'd read up on dinosaurs, you'd Google… — Jodi Picoult Copy Share Image
“I'm pretty sure those're my balls you've found,” I said to the man searching my pants. “You gonna count 'em out now?… — Nenia Campbell Copy Share Image
“Reading the book now means that one can, if one wants, play Fantasy Literature--match writers off against each other and see who… — Nick Hornby Copy Share Image
I think anyone who's perfectly happy isn't particularly funny. And when you're very, very happy, you're not very funny. You're just happy.… — Joan Rivers Copy Share Image
“Father Peregrine, won’t you ever be serious?” “Not until the good Lord is. Oh, don’t look so terribly shocked, please. The Lord… — Ray Bradbury Copy Share Image
. . . Cultivating good humor may be helpful in finding our own identity. Young people who are trying to find out… — James E. Faust Copy Share Image
“Just get up. What's your name, kid?" "G-man" "I don't mean your codename down at the Dickhead Club. What does it say… — Tad Williams Copy Share Image