“Will hated Christmas, for the obvious reason: people knocked on his door, singing the song he hated more than any song in… — Nick Hornby Copy Share Image
“These days, all I ask of Fate is that the people she hurls into my life, whether they are evil or good,… — Dean Koontz Copy Share Image
I'm going to be criticized by lots of "scholars," but I think Shakespeare's best comedy often appears in his tragedies, actually. Not… — Chukwudi Iwuji Copy Share Image
I do all these various activities like painting and writing, comedy and films probably because not that I'm good at everything but… — Takeshi Kitano Copy Share Image
We knew the front door was always left open, but we broke in just to keep in practice. Doxy turned all the… — Woody Allen Copy Share Image
“Do not let my expression dampen your good humor,” Talmanes said, tucking his pipe away. “Nor let it bother you that we… — Robert Jordan Copy Share Image
I had my own insecurities, which a lot of my comedy would come from, about not being able to live up to… — Charlie Day Copy Share Image
My first manager, he had left Germany when he was five, but he would joke about the Nazis. And I'd laugh, but… — Michael Keaton Copy Share Image
Often when you are starting out in comedy, you will find that people will laugh at the things you didn't think were… — Natasha Leggero Copy Share Image
“Miss Elizabeth Mapp might have been forty, and she had taken advantage of this opportunity by being just a year or two… — E.F. Benson Copy Share Image
“All right gentlemen, we have a job to do. At approximately 01:30 tonight, three children made an escape. Our job is to… — Sean Cullen Copy Share Image
“The life of every individual, viewed as a whole and in general, and when only its most significant features are emphasized, is… — Arthur Schopenhauer Copy Share Image
“Cucumbers are technically a fruit and in the same family as pumpkins, melons and squash, so it may benefit those markets, although,… — Jasper Fforde Copy Share Image
Leaps over walls - especially when taken late in life - can be extremely perilous. To leap successfully, you need a sense… — Monica Baldwin Copy Share Image
It seems a strange thing, but once I was able to get past that kind of self-image problem, I was able to… — Amy Poehler Copy Share Image
“They say that God watches out for children, drunks and fools. Simply put, this means I stand a two-thirds better chance for… — Lenny Castellaneta Copy Share Image
I'm not sure anybody's ready to see me in a drama. And loving movies so much, I've seen a lot of comics… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Business, like life, is funny. We all go through difficult times, and we all have to face curve balls and challenges, each… — Ronnie Apteker Copy Share Image
“As the carriage bumped her bones along the dark country lanes, Martha decided that if she ever got back to her own… — Stephen Cole Copy Share Image
I let the comedy come through the character and just try to make sure that everything is kind of rounded in a… — Eugene Levy Copy Share Image
Well Washington DC what are you going to do. They think the capitol steps are the state of the art in comedy.… — Harry Shearer Copy Share Image
In my early 20s, I started doing comedy. I started doing auditions in Chicago. It led me to writing my own sketches… — Deon Cole Copy Share Image
“Jesus Christ, is everyone on something because I want some of whatever it is," Will grumbled, reaching for George's arm and looping… — Christina Lauren Copy Share Image
“[the sheep] sidled up beside him and bumped him lovingly with its head. Val looked at it sadly. "I am sorry, you… — Robin McKinley Copy Share Image
I do an act, and I've been doing an act for 50 years. I do a variety show, which is a musical… — Debbie Reynolds Copy Share Image
“So computers are tools of the devil?" thought Newt. He had no problem believing it. Computers had to be the tools of… — Terry Pratchett Neil Gaiman Copy Share Image
“All white people are born with a singular mission in life in order to pass from regular whitehood into ultra-whitehood. Just as… — Christian Lander Copy Share Image
I was even in a comedy group for a while. It's so different. It's so completely different. The idea of going to… — Elizabeth Mitchell Copy Share Image
“As your abilities begin to grow, your angelic side will start to manifest itself in more noticeable ways." "My angelic side. Great.… — Cynthia Hand Copy Share Image
“It was funny how none of her classes in library science has prepared her for this sort of thing, dead bodies, staff… — Jenn McKinlay Copy Share Image
“Personally, I don't think that having a water goddess for an ancestress is a guarantee of freedom against seasickness, nor come to… — Philippa Gregory Copy Share Image
“BROADBENT [stiffly]. Devil is rather a strong expression in that connexion, Mr Keegan. KEEGAN. Not from a man who knows that this… — George Bernard Shaw Copy Share Image
“There's a lot of humiliation in living, but that's okay, for if the gods are always laughing, then surely at times they… — J. Andrew Schrecker Copy Share Image
“The report also said I show great potential as an agent. I figure they must be right, since I successfully broke into… — Amy McAuley Copy Share Image
“The three species of pine native to Wisconsin (white, red and jack) differ radically in their opinions about marriageable age. The precocious… — Aldo Leopold Copy Share Image
Many, many years ago before I got into comedy, I applied to be a spy for MI5. I got down to the… — Chris McCausland Copy Share Image
“Unless you intend to kill him immediately thereafter, never kick a man in the balls. Not even symbolically. Or perhaps especially not… — Robert A. Heinlein Copy Share Image
I was doing stand-up at a restaurant and there was a chalkboard on the street out front. It said, Soup of the… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
“P...U...D...D...I...N...G" "Pudding," said Roger. "They've kept some for us." "She hasn't finished the word," said Dick. Titty was reading steadily on. "H...E...A...D...S...End… — Arthur Ransome Copy Share Image
“You did a politics project on a government that got overthrown on the due date? Man, did anybody ever tell you you've… — Gordon Korman Copy Share Image
![“[the sheep] sidled up beside him and bumped him lovingly with its head. Val looked at it sadly. "I am sorry, you ugly creature," he said. "I have not used my magic in a long time, and I am very out of practice.” quote by Robin McKinley](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/21b/robin-mckinley-1591_humor_the-sheep-sidled-up-beside-him-and-bumpe_182306.png)
![“BROADBENT [stiffly]. Devil is rather a strong expression in that connexion, Mr Keegan. KEEGAN. Not from a man who knows that this world is hell. But since the word offends you, let me soften it, and compare you simply to an ass. [Larry whitens with anger]. BROADBENT [reddening]. An ass! KEEGAN…” quote by George Bernard Shaw](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/i/bc1/george-bernard-shaw-68_becoming-better_broadbent-stiffly-devil-is-rather-a-stro_3048281.jpg)
