Humor Quotes · Page 428

“Harry: I supposed getting married wouldn't be any worse than killing myself.”

— Caryl Churchill

Rick Miller hit only one home run last year, and that's like hitting none.

— Jerry Coleman

Rats have a sense of humor. Rats, in fact think the world is very funny. And they are right, dear reader. They…

— Kate DiCamillo

I am genuinely interested in comedy and I know that I have good comic timing as well.

— Neena Gupta

“Can you imagine how many people got laid in here?" Abby said, walking to the other side of the Jacuzzi.”

— J.C. Henderson

They say that love is more important than money, have you ever tried paying your bills with a hug?

— Nishan Panwar

“What thought or message would you put into a fortune cookie? Get up, stop reading this and live your life”

— Ranna

I know everybody wants humor to be subversive and speak truth to power. I don't think power's been listening, incidentally.

— Robert Mankoff

I read recently that women still make 30% less than men in the workplace. Which I think is fine, cause if we…

— Mike Birbiglia

It's great to be able to connect parents with children both emotionally and through humor. I look forward to exploring family entertainment…

— Jon Favreau

“We were aiming for a cross between Kafka and Orwell, which just goes to show how dangerous it can be when your…

— Ben Aaronovitch

We even switched to a newly-formed church across the town that gave one hundred and twenty trading stamps each time we attended.…

— Erma Bombeck

A dog came to my door, so I gave him a bone, the dog took the bone into the back yard and…

— Mitch Hedberg

We may observe in humorous authors that the faults they chiefly ridicule have often a likeness in themselves. Cervantes had much of…

— Edward Bulwer-Lytton, 1st Baron Lytton

I really like the stuff that is very absurd and very real at the same time. I think Anton Chekhov is the…

— Rainn Wilson

“I'd never seen a guy get the shit kicked out of him without a punch being landed, but there's a first time…

— Michael Harmon

“Did the harebell loose her girdle To the lover bee, Would the bee the harebell hallow Much as formerly?”

— Emily Dickinson

My sense of humor will always stand in the way of my seeing myself, my family, my race or my nation as…

— Zora Neale Hurston

“He's grinning hard, showing a dimple on his cheek that I haven't seen in forever.”

— H.M. Ward

All the people who follow me on Twitter know my sense of humor. I sometimes forget the blogosphere will give it more…

— Kurt Sutter

A comedy isn’t about being funny...a comedy is about characters who dare to know that they may choose a happy ending after…

— Gary D. Schmidt

“I had a dream about you last night... You turned red, then green, and then blue. You told me you were trying…

— Amy Summers

I have a sense of humor. I usually come off as very serious, but I definitely have a dry sense of humor.

— Bill Walsh

“Anna shuddered. "Orange is not the colour of seduction, Christopher. Orange is the colour of despair, and pumpkins.”

— Cassandra Clare

I feel comedy is one of the strongest emotions that an actor portrays and the most powerful one too.

— Rajpal Yadav

I consider myself always a humorist. And I think anybody who tells jokes or makes people laugh is humor.

— Dick Gregory

“Still nothing," Raven answered "This is shitty. We are going to have to invest in heat sensors. These motion detectors blow Satan's…

— Gabrielle Evans

I thought how proud I am to be standing up beside my dad. Never did it occur to me that he would…

— George W. Bush

“My whole life, you have made decisions for me." "Your whole life," Georgiana pointed out, "totals nine years.”

— Sarah MacLean

“A problem isn't a real problem till you decide to make it a problem... so what's the problem again?”

— Runa Magnus

I remember as a child listening to comedic musicals and thinking they were a real riot. I had pretty questionable taste in…

— Zach Woods

Call Of Duty will really have a guy thinking about joining the army...then you realize how many times you died.

— Anonymous

I think drama and comedy are pretty much all the same, and the issue is whether or not you have a sense…

— Valerie Harper

I had to choose, I'd be so sad. They are flip sides of the same coin. I love both comedy and drama.

— Dianne Wiest

The only thing I hate worse than sitting in my home all alone is doing it all by myself.

— Stanley Victor Paskavich

“Any idiot can be liked. It takes talent to scare the crap out of people"-”

— Alison Arngrim

I don't necessarily think of it as Southern comedy. I just think I'm a comedian and I have a Southern accent.

— Jeff Foxworthy

My home city of Liverpool is known for having a sense of humour because it's experienced dark times.

— Chris McCausland

If you are not supposed to drink and drive why do bars have parking lots

— Ritu Ghatourey

We are here on Earth to do good to others. What the others are here for, I don't know.

— Anonymous