Humor Quotes · Page 430

Wit and playfulness represent a desperately serious transcendence of evil. Humor is both a form of wisdom and a means of survival.

— Tom Robbins

My parents were very funny - they didn't know it. But they were. They were actually sharing an IQ.

— Tim Conway

“Often you don’t know whether you’re the hero of a romantic comedy or the villain on a Lifetime special until the restraining…

— Tim Kreider

“Got any mood music?” “If you press Play on the stereo you’re going to hear Miley Cyrus.” “I don’t know who that…

— Tere Michaels

Drama and comedy, to me ,are all about being surprising, coherent, and true, all at once.

— Tim Blake Nelson

A push up bra is like a bag of chips; you open the bag and it's half empty.

— Anonymous

I'd rather try and cram in another two gags than leave a pause to say, 'Hey, wasn't that bit funny?'

— Edgar Wright

“Say what you want about organized religion, but man, they make cool windows.”

— Alan Doyle

When I was growing up, I was really into comedy. I listened to a lot of comedy albums. I loved Richard Pryor,…

— Tony Rock

“Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned. And until tonight I had always felt that there was a lot in it.…

— P.G.Wodehouse

According to the conventions of the genre, Augustus Waters kept his sense of humor till the end, did not for a moment…

— John Green

“What is the perfect peanut butter and jelly sandwich, exactly?” Tess asked, pursing her lips. Erin knew it was her attempt at…

— Jenny Lyn

“... darkness isn't the opposite of light, it is simply its absence, and what was radiating from the book was the light…

— Terry Pratchett

“New Rule: Let the Pope be Pope. An animal-rights group in Italy has asked Pope Benedict to give up his fur-trimmed cape…

— Bill Maher

What's great about the geek spirit is that life never seems to stop us, and they never seem to kill our enthusiasm,…

— Paul Feig

“It was a witty fiction of the poets, that when Mercury had cast Argus into a sleep and with an enchanted wand…

— Thomas Watson

“Why, Jack-off... You actually have a sense of humor! You should share that playful side more often. Guys really go for it.”

— Lorelei James

I wrote three years for Lucille Ball. She taught me everything I know about physical comedy...

— Garry Marshall

Just because I do a few comedy bits about gay people, that does not mean I'm out there promoting some anti-gay cause.

— Sam Kinison

I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again.

— Joan Rivers

I'm a pretty tenacious person; I get that from my mom. So sometimes, I use dark humor. I can't take myself too…

— Art Alexakis

My mum said to me once years ago, which really spurred me on, 'You're the funniest person I know'. I loved that.

— Miranda Hart

“Your never over the hill to find true love because sometimes, that's where it is”

— Benny Bellamacina

“A picture should capture a moment, a place in time you can return to again and again.”

— Brendan T. Kelly

I was in the first submarine. Instead of a periscope, they had a kaleidoscope. "We're surrounded."

— Steven Wright

“If people would read more of these humor books, they wouldn’t need all those self-improvement books!”

— Susan C. Young

“I hate being a teenager." "Why?" "Hormones." With a sad half smile, he left.”

— Jodi Meadows

“I always tried to write a story in such a manner that I wouldn't mind buying it myself.”

— Carl Barks

“Mama has such cleverly timed headaches I wonder if she has any at all.”

— A.E. Moseley

A lot of people consider 9/11 to be a tragedy, and in some ways it is, but I think there's also opportunity…

— Zach Braff

“Bitches will take your ass down if you try to publish that. Peace out.”

— Libba Bray

“Scratch your flesh raw between your toes, but you won't find the answer.”

— Franz Kafka

I once said, 'Steve Jobs is the American Xavier Niel,' but that was humour.

— Xavier Niel

I wanna do some more goofy comedy stuff; I really enjoyed doing 'A Touch of Cloth.'

— Charlie Brooker

“Did I say stab of Self Pity? No, I was trekking through the Swamp of Self Pity at this point, waist deep…

— Nicole Hamlett

Humor is one of the most serious tools we have for dealing with impossible situations.

— Erica Jong

“My favorite text message: "I'll be there in 5 minutes...if not, read this again.”

— Anonymous Authors

“Oh, you're a picky sort, huh?" He laughed. "That takes balls, being choosy at a time like this.”

— Domashita Romero

My whole life I try to make into a comedy, so it would be nice to see that onscreen.

— Saoirse Ronan

Mixing humour and harsh reality is a very human behaviour, it's the way people stay sane in their daily lives.

— Jorge Garcia