When Richard Pryor did comedy, it was like he was having a conversation. — Tracy Morgan Copy Share Image
I was named Class Clown in the high school yearbook, so I was always turning to comedy and laughter to heal and… — Guillermo Diaz Copy Share Image
Has anyone else ever noticed the Krusty Krab is located in bikini bottom?, that can't be a coincidence, can it? — Brii Ann Copy Share Image
“Finally, Jace suspects it's a bad sign that he is referring to himself in the third person.” — Swati Avasthi Copy Share Image
“Religious fasting is the best way to cure an anorexic's spirit: in heaven her condition will be normal.” — Bauvard Copy Share Image
My friend named his car. And I don't want to be judgemental, but... what a dork. — Demetri Martin Copy Share Image
“That lot upstairs couldn't organize a booze-up in a brewery, let alone come up with a plan to save the Nine Worlds.” — Helen Stringer Copy Share Image
“Accept the fact that girls squeal when they're happy or confused or excited or scared or because they just saw a certain… — Harry H. Harrison Jr Copy Share Image
“If you're trying to disguise yourself to fool an approaching enemy, then try impersonating a nutsack. Just puff out your cheeks and… — Robert Hamburger Copy Share Image
“Dexter the Magnificent, who doth bestride the world like a Colossus, many lovely corpses at his feet, brought to you in live… — Jeff Lindsay Copy Share Image
“After a dream like that, you're grateful that it was just a dream, that no matter how bad your actual life, it… — Brock Clarke Copy Share Image
As I understand from the real military personnel who I've had the opportunity to speak to over the last few years, humor… — Daniela Ruah Copy Share Image
“In the eleventh century obese English king William the Conqueror took to bed and consumed nothing but alcohol to shed pounds, a… — David Sax Copy Share Image
Humor is a blessing to me. My earliest recollections are of looking at something and seeing the lighter side. But it's always… — Roy Clark Copy Share Image
“If we can expect another journey tomorrow, we should secure horses," Ferrin went on. "And if the sun will be shining, perhaps… — Brandon Mull Copy Share Image
“Who would I kill?” I asked, sitting up from him, wiping my face. “Who?” “Yeah, I mean, is it random, or do… — A.M. Hudson Copy Share Image
Like a welcome summer rain, humor may suddenly cleanse and cool the earth, the air and you. — Langston Hughes Copy Share Image
I like being a Baha'i who has an out-there sense of humor. God gives us talents and faculties, and making people laugh… — Rainn Wilson Copy Share Image
“I like to see an angry Englishman," said Poirot. "They are very amusing. The more emotional they feel the less command they… — Agatha Christie Copy Share Image
“People think I must be a strange person. This is not correct. I have the heart of a small boy. It is… — Stephen King Copy Share Image
“No, I don't think I will kiss you, although you need kissing, badly. That's what's wrong with you.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
How about a good comedy? 'Raising Arizona.' Remains the funniest movie I've ever seen in my life. — Lee Unkrich Copy Share Image
“P.S. I also note that you included the Stalker's Anthem "Every Breath You Take" I do enjoy our sense of humor, but… — E.L. James Copy Share Image
“He holds his hands up to keep the Reapers from advancing. I forgot Zack's flair for the melodramatic. ~Exposing ELE” — Courtney Nuckels Copy Share Image
“Really? well, thank you. I was under the impression you wouldn't spit on me if I was on fire” — Abbi Glines Copy Share Image
How can I tell if someone is pretty on the inside without looking in all of her orifices? — Rock Cowles Copy Share Image
“No wonder I worried about talking dirty; talking in general seemed to escape me.” — Jordan Castillo Price Copy Share Image
I love my fed-ex guy cause he's a drug dealer and he don't even know it...and he's always on time. — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
“Anxiety's like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but it doesn't get you very far.” — Jodi Picoult Copy Share Image
The life of every individual is really always a tragedy, but gone through in detail, it has the character of a comedy. — Arthur Schopenhauer Copy Share Image
As soon as I heard the term 'comedy nerd,' I'd hoped there was a lot of them. — Pete Holmes Copy Share Image
I chose Eat: LA as a broadcast partner because of its good taste, sense of humor, and spirit of adventure. — John Rabe Copy Share Image
People like me doing comedy, especially after 'Khatron Ke Khiladi,' where they got a glimpse. — Sana Khan Copy Share Image
Marriage is an institution in which a Man loses his Bachelors degree, and the Woman gets her Masters. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Life sucks, then you find a bunch of funny comments of how life sucks on the internet, then you laugh and realize… — Daniel Smith Copy Share Image
You know, I'm not very good at magic - I can only do half of a trick. Yes - I'm a member… — Tim Vine Copy Share Image
“...It’s pretty simple, really: having fun can only led to having more fun-- it cannot led to injury, pain, or dismemberment.” — Tom Upton Copy Share Image
“I try to imagine what type of girl Connor would seek, but she seems unfathomable--like a hazy picture with only her brain… — Becca Ritchie Copy Share Image
If they make it illegal to wear the veil at work, bee keepers are going to be furious. — Milton Jones Copy Share Image
Humor is a social lubricant that helps us get over some of the bad spots. — Steve Allen Copy Share Image
