“That's like leaping off a precipice and trying to knit yourself a parachute on the way down.” — Kelli Jae Baeli Copy Share Image
“if the creator of the universe is spending all his time watching you, it must surly be because he loves you.” — David Mazzucchelli Copy Share Image
“I’ve lowered my character with a great deal of unwholesome reading material.” — Lisa Kleypas Copy Share Image
“...socialism had somehow made time more flexible. There were often situations when 1 PM and 5 PM were interchangeable.” — Colin Cotterill Copy Share Image
I don't like comedy. I like funny things. I don't like comedy. Like, comedy movies are just, 'Oh Jesus.' — Louis C. K Copy Share Image
“Monday; a cross between Wednesday this week and Thursday next week." - Jonathan "Jack" McVoy” — E.J. Eisman Copy Share Image
“Altid skal man være på vagt, ellers Vupti, så faldt pikken ind i kussen, og flødeskumskagen ind i kæften.” — Jeanett Veronica Hindberg Copy Share Image
What is a committee? A group of the unwilling, picked from the unfit, to do the unnecessary. — Richard Harkness Copy Share Image
“It's obvious which one you are,' Jimmy Hailler tells me as we walk through Hyde Park. 'If it's so obvious why can't… — Melina Marchetta Copy Share Image
Being around Lily Tomlin has been great, how she treats people, how she handles herself, how she goes about interpreting her character… — Baron Vaughn Copy Share Image
“If we had known it would eventually involve the KGB, the French National Police, and the Supreme Allied Commander in Europe, we… — Rosanne Parry Copy Share Image
“Jaime smiled. "I hope you're not thinking of taking the black on us, sweet brother." Tyrion laughed. "What, me, celibate? The whores… — George R.R. Martin Copy Share Image
I should say, one of the things about being a widow or a widower, you really, really need a sense of humor,… — Joyce Carol Oates Copy Share Image
My dad doesn't get any of my jokes. He laughs at them, but he doesn't understand them. He's just laughing because people… — Zach Galifianakis Copy Share Image
My mother taught me what it is to have a sense of humour; my dad, who was a headmaster, everything you need… — James Nesbitt Copy Share Image
“So this is what you two do when you’re up here,” Dean drawls. “All that deep, intensive tutoring.” He air-quotes the last… — Elle Kennedy Copy Share Image
“I wish someone had told you that you're a terrible liar so I wouldn't have to be the first one. I feel… — T.J. Klune Copy Share Image
It's not so hard to get rich as it is to know when you have gotten rich. — Josh Billings Copy Share Image
With song titles, I try to keep a healthy sense of humor while saying something at the same time. — Arca Copy Share Image
“The show doesn’t go on because it’s ready; it goes on because it’s 11:30.” — Lorne Michaels Copy Share Image
“Nancy was so thrilled, I thought she was going to kiss me—and I thought I was actually going to have to hit… — Jennifer L. Armentrout Copy Share Image
“If a UFO did land, and invite me onboard, I'd love to have the balls to go in. So, I search the… — Kelli Jae Baeli Copy Share Image
“Tanaquil gently toed the peeve. "I'll unfasten the window. Jump out to the lower roof and run." "Stay and bite," said the… — Tanith Lee Copy Share Image
“Tequila often gave people the desire to tackle the impossible. It did not, however, make impossible possible” — Darynda Jones Copy Share Image
“Soy cappuccino,’ I growled, while doing as instructed. ‘I should have known you were evil.” — Maria Lewis Copy Share Image
Comedy deflates the sense precisely so that the underlying lubricity and malice may bubble to the surface. — Paul Goodman Copy Share Image
“I'm sorry, Mr. Whiteleaf. I'm not going to let a monster eat me for minimum wage.” — A. Lee Martinez Copy Share Image
This is a free country, madam. We have a right to share your privacy in a public place. — Peter Ustinov Copy Share Image
“The house seemed to have all the comforts of little Children, dirt and litter.” — Jane Austen Copy Share Image
Sunday is Senior Citizens' Day. And if you want to become a senior citizen, just call the Padre ticket office. — Jerry Coleman Copy Share Image
“Writer's Block is just an excuse by people who don't write for not writing.” — Giando Sigurani Copy Share Image
“After a long moment, Laurent said, “I’m going to need some help standing up.” — C.S. Pacat Copy Share Image
Spirituality does not have to be serious. You are spirituality. Fun laughter heal you faster than anything. Introduce fun back into your… — Anita Moorjani Copy Share Image
“She had so many freckles that Erskine wondered if she might have stolen some from other children.” — Ned Beauman Copy Share Image
“How do you express a skinny blonde werewolf and a former toad in a cake?” — Elizabeth A. Reeves Copy Share Image
“I can take care of myself,” I said hotly. “Darlin, you don't even know how to pleasure yourself.” — Nenia Campbell Copy Share Image
Why does Beyonce sings: 'to the left?'. Because niggers don't have any rights — Benjamin Dm Copy Share Image
“Sometimes it's best to keep things to yourself - if you know what I mean. That's wisdom.” — Art Hochberg Copy Share Image
My wheelhouse is intense characters who have a certain sympathetic streak and also a sense of humor. — Billy Bob Thornton Copy Share Image
