Humor Quotes · Page 183

“Just roll me in fairy dust and call me a unicorn.”

— Lita Burke

Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue.

— Virginia Woolf

“Even if it's a witty, singing and dancing turd, it's still a turd.”

— Stephen King

“If money could talk I’d translate.”

— Vincent James Perrone

“This is the last time Abel lets the humans make the plans.”

— Claudia Gray

If the gods have no sense of humor they must weep a great deal.

— Pearl Mary Teresa Craigie

“The wise man sees the fool & laughs, yet the fool never knows why”

— Jovie Sumner

“I’m Scottish. My idea of foreplay is “roll over, Margaret.”

— Andrea Speed

Don't you love it when you're busy all you want to do is rest butttttttttttttt when your relaxing all you want to…

— MrAwesome

Frank Sinatra enjoyed my humor, so I could say almost anything to him. I mean, within reason.

— Don Rickles

A general truth is to have a good sense of humor. Roll with the punches of life's ups and downs. Laughing at…

— Jill Abramson

“So now you have it. The plot, the whole plot, and nothing but the plot.”

— Elizabeth Peters

“Sweet Katilyn, you called me remember? There's nothing I wouldn't do for you?…”

— Jessica Wennberg

I spent 11 years at 'The Daily Show,' and I learned everything there about how to write funny, how to write funny…

— David Javerbaum

I hate it when my leg falls asleep. I know that means it's going to be up all night.

— Steven Wright

I want to do comedy films, serious films - I admire the actors who fly under the radar but get loads done,…

— Craig Roberts

I believe comedy is a really good lens to filter serious issues through. If people are laughing, they don't necessarily realize until…

— Kenya Barris

“Reed: "What's up?" Vanessa: "There must be an accident or something." Reed: "I'm the accident." Vanessa: "I couldn't agree more." Reed: "What…

— Jenny O'Connell

I remember when I wanted to start touring for comedy. That's when podcasts were just kicking off. So I listened to every…

— Janelle James

“Go to the meat market of a Saturday night and see the crowds of live bipeds staring up at the long rows…

— Herman Melville

The rules I go by are: Always keep your villains bad, and keep the plot grounded and real. If you keep those…

— Peter Segal

“How delightful! Dunford had just come into an unexpected inheritance. She rather hoped it was something good. One of her friends had…

— Julia Quinn

“It's a good thing you're an aging orphan," he murmured, gently pushing the hair away from her face. "I don't have to…

— Anne Stuart

Candidates should be extremely cautious in displaying a sense of humor. If he or she tells a joke with a point, there…

— Jack Germond

My wife is very funny and very organized.

— Terry Dubrow

I became popular as Bua because of 'Comedy Nights with Kapil.'

— Upasana Singh

“I was safe. Uncomfortable as hell, but safe.-Bobby, RR ”

— D.J. MacHale

“Communism will kill you quicker than a maraschino cherry ever will.”

— Stephan Eirik Clark

Laughter means nothing unless there have been tears.

— Jack Hyles

“That was not sex. That was naked poetry.”

— Hank Moody

Even when low-brow comedy ruled, I ensured my lines were not vulgar.

— Kovai Sarala

“Twango's hospitality, though largely symbolic, does him credit.”

— Jack Vance

Warning: Humor may be hazardous to your illness.

— Ellie Katz

And an airplane of spittle dived into the sea, there were no salivas.

— Tommy Cooper

I can't eat spaghetti. There's too many of them.

— Mitch Hedberg

Welcome To Karachi' lets me try finer comedy.

— Jackky Bhagnani

Billy Almon has all of his in-laws and outlaws here this afternoon.

— Jerry Coleman

The duty of comedy is to correct men by amusing them.

— Moliere

Tell the truth, even if they do look at you funny.

— Holmes Osborne

Absolute seriousness is never without a dash of humor.

— Dietrich Bonhoeffer