“I don't wanna be the joker who makes eyes full of tears in the end” — Ags Orachimaruu Copy Share Image
“Why don't you and I have a nice penetrating man-to-man conversation?” — Sanami Matoh Copy Share Image
America's biggest failure is its inability to take comedy seriously. — H. L. Mencken Copy Share Image
“Did you let him know that if he can't see fit to return your blow job immediately, you will have no choice… — Meg Cabot Copy Share Image
The only way I can make a Jim Carrey face is through Novocain at the dentists office. — Sasha Azevedo Copy Share Image
I've got a friend whose nickname is "Shagger". You might think that's pretty cool. She doesn't like it. — Jimmy Carr Copy Share Image
“Then it was just the two of us. Me and Captain Hetero of the Straight Brigade.” — T.J. Klune Copy Share Image
This book is dedicated to Wilbur and Orville Wright, without whom air sickness would still be just a dream. — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
“Your LIFE is a PUZZLE, don’t waste your time trying to place people where they don’t fit” — Thabang Gideon Magaola Copy Share Image
A perfect method of adding drama to life is to wait until the deadline looms large. — Alyce Cornyn-Selby Copy Share Image
“If you put your hand in my pocket, you’ll drag back six inches of bloody stump.” — Harlan Ellison Copy Share Image
“Parker fixated on the envelope's precise penmanship as she lifted it. Her grandmother rarely took the time to write her own name… — Abby Slovin Copy Share Image
“You know when you really, really think about it, the whole digital reality is a real trip. The left side of the… — Art Hochberg Copy Share Image
“Murphy,” I hissed. “Are you absolutely sure about this hair? That it belongs to Kravos?” If it didn’t, the doll wouldn’t do… — Jim Butcher Copy Share Image
“The furniture in the house had the same relationship to real furnishings that drag queens have to real women. Everything was a… — Bob Smith Copy Share Image
Why is comedy the only form of the arts where people think they have to agree with or approve the content? You… — Jim Norton Copy Share Image
I've been spending quite a bit of time writing, acting, and making films. Because I'm doing all this extra writing, acting, and… — John Morrison Copy Share Image
“She wagged a finger at him. “You’re mispronouncing that word.” “Your pardon?” He groped, trying to remember what he’d said. “Suffragette? How… — Courtney Milan Copy Share Image
“humorous writing, the exclamation mark is the equivalent of canned laughter (F. Scott Fitzgerald – that well-known knockabout gag-man – said it… — Lynne Truss Copy Share Image
“Do shut your mouth--you'll catch flies sitting there like that.” — Jonathan L. Howard Copy Share Image
“Where do you get bitter cherries?" Deuce asked. "Disgruntled trees.” — Abigail Roux Copy Share Image
