I don't think anyone leaves Las Vegas rejuvenated, their skin shining, their bank accounts glowing. No one leaves Vegas, like, 'I didn't make one mistake. That felt great. Back to work.' — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
Women are often scrutinized when they have pets that men wouldn't have. We are immediately faulted for having the wrong kind of pet rather than anyone first think, 'Wow, she rescued an animal that would have been otherwise killed and… — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
I've do a lot of USO shows and do whatever I can to support the military. — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
Everybody has their cross to bear, and everybody has their issues. But it still never once occurred to me that I'm not as good… — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
There's a way to express femininity and independence and strength without going for hanging fruit. — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
I was a huge 'Blind Date' fan, though, when I was younger; that was on when I was in high school. — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
When you travel, try having an open mind, not just about the city that you're in but about the surrounding areas. — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
Most women have jobs that require them to leave the house. A cat is actually a perfect pet. You get the love and companionship… — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
What keeps me going is that this I all there is. I am a comedian, and this is what I do. It's like telling… — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
A lot of comedians are really funny onstage, but they can't do a podcast. — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
I used to take a recorder around and interview my parents and do impressions of my classmates as guests on my show. — Iliza Shlesinger Copy Share Image
