Things will go as they will, and there is no need to hurry to meet them. — J. R. R. Tolkien Copy Share Image
He who loses money, loses much; He who loses a friend, loses much more; He who loses faith, loses all. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“What happened to your face?" she asked. "It fell on a fist." He shrugged. "That happens a lot?" "Enough.” — Melissa de la Cruz Copy Share Image
I look forward to the day when I can be Republican again. I'm an Alan Simpson Republican. — Alan K. Simpson Copy Share Image
Change is not a four letter word...but often your reaction to it is! — Jeffrey Gitomer Copy Share Image
You can't have filenames longer than 14 chars. You can't even think about them! — Larry Wall Copy Share Image
PARTNERSHIP, A legal fiction exactly like marriage, but without the major benefits — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Where there is Peace, there is Culture; Where there is Culture, there is Peace. — Nicholas Roerich Copy Share Image
The Hawaiian Islands were discovered by hardy Polynesian sailors, who crossed thousands of miles of open ocean in primitive canoes, braving violent… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
I think since I'm not particularly well-known as myself, it's funny all the different perceptions people have of me. Like, if someone's… — Mary Elizabeth Winstead Copy Share Image
I know what you want. And I know what you need. But I'm gonna screw it up, yeah, cause I'm an idiot.… — Jimmy Fallon Copy Share Image
I always ended up having the funny part in Shakespeare, but I really thought I'd be doing theater. That was my ambition… — Jane Lynch Copy Share Image
If Justin Bieber and One direction were drowning and you could only save one, would you go to lunch or read the… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
My dad was listening to me noodle around on the guitar in the house and sing, and he was like, 'Man, you're… — Walker Hayes Copy Share Image
“I prey on innocent villagers and terrify their children," he said with a nasty smile. "And sometimes when I'm feeling really evil,… — Kate Avery Ellison Copy Share Image
So if you're black or brown, you can make money in America, you can get rich in America... but whatever you decide… — Chris Rock Copy Share Image
Someone told me I should run for president. Dont you think that weve had enough boobs in the White House? — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Nothing is going to be handed to you -- you have to make things happen. — Florence Griffith Joyner Copy Share Image
We make our money out of our friends. Our enemies will not do business with us. — Elbert Hubbard Copy Share Image
I bought these shoes in Taiwan, and they said in the inside "made around the corner." — Frank Carson Copy Share Image
I am dating, but it is hard to find someone quick enough and funny enough. I am quite demanding. — Anne Robinson Copy Share Image
I'm staying in shape this winter by wearing enough layers to be constantly sweating. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
This July 4th, let's celebrate our freedom to be trapped for five hours in horrifying standstill traffic — Anonymous Copy Share Image
It's not the parts of the Bible I don't know that worries me...it's the parts that I do. — Mark Twain Copy Share Image
It is what a woman, leaves off, not what she puts on that gives her cachet — Paul Poiret Copy Share Image
I'm a woofer, not a tweeter; a writer, not a telegrapher; an essayist, not an aphorist. — Richard Turner Copy Share Image
I just sit ther and do what I vowed I would never do - talk back to the television. — George H. W. Bush Copy Share Image
Dwarves are funny. Look at them scurrying away on their stumpy little legs. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I dont have any exs I have whys? Yeah why in the hell did I date you!!!? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Live nutty. Just occasionally. Just once in a while. And see what happens. It brightens up the day. — Leo Buscaglia Copy Share Image
Money is not my business; my thinking is my business. I don't have any other business. — Byron Katie Copy Share Image
Q: Does this train stop at Brighton? A: I hope so or there's going to be a hell of a splash. — Kenny Everett Copy Share Image
Bacon is like the opposite of medicine. It's like, "Take that, Lipitor." — Jim Gaffigan Copy Share Image
There is a strength of conviction that can only come from being 100% wrong. — Stephen Schneider Copy Share Image
I am not really funny . I am actually mean and people think that I am joking — MLY AB Copy Share Image
Dear 12 year olds on Facebook, how are you in a complicated relationship?! Did they steal your cookies? — Christine Ramkran Copy Share Image
