At least not having an office window means you'll never know how nice it is outside.. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
We have had to learn that history is neither a God nor a redeemer. — Reinhold Niebuhr Copy Share Image
I got some tartar-control toothpaste a while back. I've still got tartar, but it's under control. — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
Remember what the Bible says: He who is without sin, cast the first rock. And I shall smoketh it. — Dave Chappelle Copy Share Image
I respect whoever created woman in the army, women on their period with weapons... GENIUS!! — Noor Copy Share Image
Some of us worship in churches, some in synagogues, some on golf courses... — Adlai Stevenson I Copy Share Image
Cheryl Cole and Katy Perry are two of the hottest girls in the world - and so normal and funny with it.… — Justin Bieber Copy Share Image
Funny in Michigan you can be a seasonal boyfriend and in the summer you can take off But in the winter you… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
There is more to be said for stupidity than people imagine. Personally I have a great admiration for stupidity. It is a… — Oscar Wilde Copy Share Image
Here's the funny thing: Nothing drives a performance like an audience that gives back and even takes over. ECW was a product… — Paul Heyman Copy Share Image
“He's not my boyfriend." "Ha. That's a good one. I saw you two tonsil surfing out there." I could kill her. "I… — Carrie Jones Copy Share Image
“Lachlain and Emma: 'So you expect us to sit in this enclosed compartment the entire way in silence?' 'Of course not.' She… — Kresley Cole Copy Share Image
When someone says 'Id explain but its complicated.' Im not offended they think so little of me, Im offended they think so… — Olivia Munn Copy Share Image
If there's an audience, I think they're going to expect me to be funny. But what if I'm not funny? What if… — Gene Wilder Copy Share Image
