When a monkey nibbles on a penis, it's funny in any language. -Alan — The Hangover 2 Copy Share Image
Ronically, in this world, a poor doesn't have clothes to wear and a rich doesn't want wear proper clothes. — Ritu Ghatourey Copy Share Image
The act of expressing oneself is a physical one. It materializes the thought. — Asger Jorn Copy Share Image
Teacher: I'm calling your parents! Age 10: Omg no! Please! Age 13: Whatever.. Age 15+: Tell them I said Heyyy! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
To play the leading man in a 'Three Stooges' movie, you've got to think funny. Thank God I think funny. — Adam West Copy Share Image
I was just a ham since about the age of five. If I was performing at Medieval Times or something, I'd be… — Emma Stone Copy Share Image
Reason why I'm single 1) I can't date myself 2) I can't date my celebrity crush 3) I can't date food 4)… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I think we've missed a trick there. We could develop wheat with the properties of Velcro... to catch whatever it is that's… — Bill Bailey Copy Share Image
I use the word totally too much. I need to change it up and use a word that is different but has… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
I don't want to get the same looks I give people when they get on a plane holding a baby: "That's a… — Ellen DeGeneres Copy Share Image
I always wanted my kids to like me and think I was funny, so I made up this story about a kid… — Rhea Perlman Copy Share Image
You initially become funny as a kid because you're looking for attention and love. Psychologists think that's all to do with mother… — Eric Idle Copy Share Image
My knowledge of Vancouver and Canada was limited to what I knew about Bob and Doug McKenzie. I thought they were funny,… — Peter DeLuise Copy Share Image
