Mike Laga will make you forget about every power hitter that ever lived. — Sparky Anderson Copy Share Image
“... flattening their scorn underneath the chariot wheels of her superiority.” — Muriel Spark Copy Share Image
Dear Customer Service: First of all, you should know that Im typing this with my middle finger. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Most of my dancing is actually convulsions from having to listen to my own music — Thom Yorke Copy Share Image
Funny songs, that’s my ticket. I can’t remember when it started or why it started, it’s just something that I NEEDED. — Jack Black Copy Share Image
Raw parsley makes me gag. It's the same for my mum and my sister. Which is funny because apparently parsley was used… — Daisy Lowe Copy Share Image
The number of times you say Dont judge me is directly proportional to the amount of things you do that you know… — Lars Propst Copy Share Image
MARRIAGE CEREMONY, a ritual which should be written (o cut down on divorces) -- by adding a line to the groom's questions… — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
I hate when your friends quit drinking on you, don't you? It's sad. I've lost more friends to AA than Liberace did… — Doug Stanhope Copy Share Image
“You're ruining that book!" He pointed to the page I'd torn out. "That's a perfectly good book!" Holding his gaze, I reached… — Kate Avery Ellison Copy Share Image
“Tom Cruise isn't that big of a guy," my mom always says. I love how she tries to avoid using the word… — A.E. Cannon Copy Share Image
But I think once the word gets out that the movie is funny - funny is transcendent - it will traverse all… — Thomas Haden Church Copy Share Image
