Power isn’t just about going forward. It’s about not letting anything hold you back. — Patrick Willis Copy Share Image
Don't give any kinda fruit away this Halloween trick or treaters don't want that shit. Sincerely, kids — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When life gives you lemons, find someone who has vodka and throw a party. — Charith Thilina Copy Share Image
I don't do comedy. I think if a situation is funny you just play it for real and if it's funny, it's… — Morgan Freeman Copy Share Image
I call my dad 'Admiral Ass Hat,' he doesn't really think it's funny. — Jay Crownover Copy Share Image
There are only two things wrong with C++: The initial concept and the implementation. — Bertrand Meyer Copy Share Image
All beauty is a making one of opposites, and the making one of opposites is what we are going after in ourselves. — Eli Siegel Copy Share Image
“Some people are each holding on to a lover of theirs who no longer loves them and/or who they no longer love,… — Mokokoma Mokhonoana Copy Share Image
You've read newspaper stories about elderly widows who die and leave their entire estates to their pet cats, right? Well, your cat… — Dave Barry Copy Share Image
A man up in front of a judge says "I don't recognise this court." "Why not?" "It's been redecorated since the last… — Frank Carson Copy Share Image
Dear Face Wash Commercials, nobody actually splashes their face with water like that. Sincerely, my whole damn bathroom floor is wet. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Not one word about proposals, no matter how much she pushes,” I told my friends. “No matter what she says or how… — Molly Harper Copy Share Image
My fiance and I had a fight over household expenses. He's never had a job in his life, but this didn't stop… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I was never funny. I'd be funny once a year at Christmas. I'd do impressions of how people talked and danced, but… — Carlos Mencia Copy Share Image
