The internet should have a place where you can officially register as an Ass Guy or Boob Guy. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Dear Microsoft Word, I'm pretty sure I spelled my name right. Sincerely, EVERYBODY WITH AN UN-COMMON NAME — Anonymous Copy Share Image
No matter how old I get, I'm still going to mentally sing ABC's to see which letter comes next..!! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
People who have no faults are terrible; there is no way of taking advantage of them. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Roses are red, that much is true, but violets are purple, not fucking blue. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Facebook asks me what I'm thinking. Twitter asks what I'm doing. Foursquare asks where I am. The internet has turned into a… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Its funny. you dump me for her, and when she doesnt want you or a any other girls u come crying back… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
When you hear people speak in another language: 6% I wish I could speak that. 94% Those bitches better not be talking about me... — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God…I could be… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That Awkward Moment When Your At Church in Front Of Everyone And Your 5 Year Old Cousin Slaps Your butt, Laughs, Than… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The hardest part of your divorce will be finding an attractive recent picture of yourself to upload on a dating site. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“We need to remember what's important in life: friends, waffles, work. Or waffles, friends, work. Doesn't matter, but work is third.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
On the 12th day of Christmas, my Facebook gave too me, 12 stupid bitches, 11 fake people, 10 FB hackings, 9 new… — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Didn't know how to say farewell so I slapped him in the face and ran away. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Am I the only one who spends their weekends on the computer,eating, and watching movies all by themselves? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
I hope I get to go home tomorrow.. I hate being here at my moms house.. - — Anonymous Copy Share Image
TheBiggestLies Classmate: Do you have any gum? ; Me: Nah man, I got it from someone else. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
People say that beauty is on the inside, but I would prefer a pretty face over a pretty kidney. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
“Evil influence is like a nicotine patch, you cannot help but absorb what sticks to you.” — Anonymous Copy Share Image
There's nothing cure or funny or lovable about being cheap. It's a total turn-off. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Me: Haha I'm older! Friend:Haha you'll die first! Me: Not if I get my license first and run you over bitch! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
That awkward moment when... You hear a joke in someone else's conversation & accidentally laugh. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
If alcohol kills millions of brain cells, how come it never killed the ones that made me want to drink? — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Delete me... Like most of y'all who can't handle what I have to say :') Dont got time for any of y'all. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Its funny how you can tell when someone likes someone else, but you cant tell when someone likes you. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Just realized the tooth fairy teaches us to sell our body parts for money! — Anonymous Copy Share Image
My level of sarcasm is to a point where I don't even know if I'm kidding or not. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Happy Father's Day to someone who knew long before me that all the boys I brought home were jerks. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
And a tear rolled down her cheek, as she said goodbye; because she's walking away, and she's never looking back — Anonymous Copy Share
You'll seldom experience regret for anything that you've done. It is what you haven't done that will torment you. The message, therefore, is clear.… — Anonymous Copy Share
Scrabble - The game is available in Braille. That’s a nice fact. This makes me feel better about humanity for some reason. I can’t… — Anonymous Copy Share
“THIS tale of my sore-troubled life I write, To thank the God of nature, who conveyed My soul to me, and with such care… — Anonymous Copy Share
Put on my J's and dance the whole night away Im naughty by nature like Im hip-hop hooray With my hands in the sky,… — Anonymous Copy Share
Me.. I have been through a lot, but I still manage to have a smile on my face. Im not worried about the past… — Anonymous Copy Share
Distance is a test of love. many will fail for those who can't withstand it, but for those who can, theres only one answer… — Anonymous Copy Share
The only person I've ever purposely caused pain here is myself...By simply sharing, caring too much. — Anonymous Copy Share
The truth is, of course, that the curtness of the Ten Commandments is an evidence, not of the gloom and narrowness of a religion,… — Anonymous Copy Share
