I got mugged. And they got my knapsack with my comedy notebook in it. So if anybody see two cholos bombing at the Funny Bone chain, that would be them. Just give me a jingle. — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
Listen, young people, I understand narcissism - clearly. But at least I have the decency to hate myself. And that's what's missing from the… — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
I was a 36C or D, and at 5' 1'', I knew that being a small person with big boobs standing in front of… — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
Pedestrian's rights - because we live in California, I've got to address this issue. I don't know where on the fence I am about… — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
To combat social awkwardness, I would just act like I couldn't be bothered - that kind of aloof persona or aloof demeanor. It's so… — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
A war is going to destroy our economy even further. It's going to be a threefold humanitarian disaster. — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
We're our own worst enemies a lot of the time, but I still blame men. — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
There's a fake Facebook me. There's a fake me Twittering. Sometimes, when it was at the height of right-wing nonsense picking on me, there… — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
Here's what the right-wing has in, there's no shortage of the natural resources of ignorance, apathy, hate, fear. As long as those things are… — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
I think people are very cynical with actors trying to tell them what to believe in, or lobbying for any kind of changing of… — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
Not that I was ever an asshole but I used to be much more of a bulldozer. — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
The world would be better off with multiple superpowers. When Communist USSR was a superpower, the world was better off. — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
Evil is in the face of every frat guy that ever raised a beer cup and went "whoooooo!" — Janeane Garofalo Copy Share Image
