Facebook status Quotes by Anonymous · Page 4

Things that probably shouldn't be broken: 1. Hearts 2. Promises 3. Condoms

— Anonymous

If I liked your status on facebook that means u have entertained me.

— Anonymous

My hair looks good: 3% at school. 7% at home. 90% before I'm about to shower.

— Anonymous

Chocolate makes everything better. Except obesity...

— Anonymous

I have learned that sometimes SORRY is not enough. You actually have to change yourself.

— Anonymous

There's no sin in loving a man, only pain.

— Anonymous

That annoying moment when two people start a conversation on YOUR facebook status.

— Anonymous

I've always wanted to walk up to a stranger and hand him a briefcase and whisper, 'You know what to do.' and…

— Anonymous

Taking forever to pick up a phone call because you're dancing to your ring tone.

— Anonymous

Starbuck's drinks are pretty much Jesus in a beverage.

— Anonymous

I don't want a relation where people say,''they look so cute together'' I want a relation where people say,''look how happy they…

— Anonymous

When a waitress tells me the plate is hot I can't help but touch it anyway.

— Anonymous

That awkward moment when you trip, over nothing.

— Anonymous

Hearing a part of a song and thinking...'That's definitely going to be my next status!'

— Anonymous

That awkward moment when your parents ask if you like anyone.

— Anonymous

That awesome moment when you find an onion ring at the bottom of your fries!

— Anonymous

I never understood why people take pictures of themselves giving the finger. Was the camera mean to you?

— Anonymous

It's always awesome when my blinker matches the beat of the song on the radio.

— Anonymous

I can go an entire day without Facebook, but I've never made it through an entire weekend.

— Anonymous

Don't lose your dignity and self respect trying to make people love and appreciate you, when they just aren't capable...!!!

— Anonymous

I need to talk to you Is the one sentence that has the power to make you remember every bad thing you've…

— Anonymous

Everything seem way longer when it's only a few minutes away.

— Anonymous

Is it just me, or is Instagram just Auto-Tune for photos?

— Anonymous

I don't trust people that put the twist tie back on the bread...just spin it.

— Anonymous

All this makeup is hiding how certain girls really look. Smokey eyes,thick ass eyebrows. Gotta take these b*tches swimmin on the first…

— Anonymous

That awkward moment when someone is wearing more makeup than clothes.

— Anonymous

If cockroaches can survive a nuclear blast, what the hell is in raid?

— Anonymous

Exercise is not: Jumping to conclusions, running off at the mouth, stretching the truth, bending over backwards or side stepping responsibility.

— Anonymous

Because of Facebook I have failing grades, insomnia & I'm slowly beginning to see the fake in people as the days go by.

— Anonymous

Dear William and Kate, If William is 100% royal and Kate is 0% royal, will that make your son the half-blood prince? Sincerely, curious.

— Anonymous

You live, you laugh, you love, you learn. You scream, you cry, you crash, you burn.

— Anonymous

What I do when I like someone: 1% - talk to them. 99% - stare. :p

— Anonymous

I'd like to thank Tetris for making me really good at loading my dishwasher.

— Anonymous

Congratulations on buying a car that will go 0-60 in 5 seconds whether you want it to or not.

— Anonymous

Wearing a hoodie and shorts because youre confused about the weather.

— Anonymous

That awkward moment when theres a guy working at Victorias Secret.

— Anonymous

The government may force me to have health insurance but they can never force me to respect my body.

— Anonymous

Ladies, when a guy whistles at you, ignore him. You're a lady, not a dog.

— Anonymous

That awkward moment when someone says 'Hello!' and you are like 'Good thanks!'

— Anonymous

If you've got a problem with me, tell me. Don't go putting it around on Facebook and then expect me to know…

— Anonymous