“If television's a babysitter, the Internet is a drunk librarian who won't shut up.” — Dorothy Gambrell Copy Share Image
My dad was the town drunk. Most of the time that's not so bad; but New York City? — Henny Youngman Copy Share Image
Drunk Twitter because embarrassing myself in one zip code was never enough. — Nikhil Saluja Copy Share Image
Talking to a drunk person was like talking to an extremely happy, severely brain-damaged three-year-old. — John Green Copy Share Image
I wanna get drunk 'til I'm off my mind. One bourbon, one scotch, and one beer. — John Lee Hooker Copy Share Image
That which hath made them drunk hath made me bold; What hath quenched them hath given me fire. — William Shakespeare Copy Share Image
It takes a while to tell stories, I think it's because I was drunk for three years. — Gerard Way Copy Share Image
The true meaning of the precepts is not just that one should refrain from drinking alcohol, but also from getting drunk on… — Bassui Tokusho Copy Share Image
Last night you left me and slept your own deep sleep. Tonight you turn and turn. I say, 'You and I will… — Rumi Copy Share Image
I don't have any interest in going out to clubs. I love people, and I love socializing, I just don't have any… — Taylor Swift Copy Share Image
Unfortunately, a lot of people are stupid. They take drugs. They get drunk and do all the wrong things in life. I… — Bobby Vinton Copy Share Image
The thing I'd really like to see is the old London Bridge, with all the old buildings around it like Shakespeare's Globe.… — Alan Davies Copy Share Image
“True, I am drunk, and small, and damp, but mistake not my moistness for weakness, although there's an argument to be made… — Christopher Moore Copy Share Image
I would imagine the inside of a bottle of cleaning fluid is really clean. I would imagine a vodka bottle is really… — Mitch Hedberg Copy Share Image
“When I'm in pain I want everyone I love on the island with me, sitting around the fire, getting drunk on coconut… — Melanie Gideon Copy Share Image
“Everyone was amazed and puzzled. They each heard their own language! “What does this mean?” some asked. Others sneered, “They’re drunk on… — Daniel Partner Copy Share Image
“There were, however, a few exceptions. One was Norma Dodsworth, the poet, who had not unpleasantly drunk but had been sensible enough… — Arthur C. Clarke Copy Share Image
What people unfortunately relate to when they think of Alaska oil was when the Exxon Valdez went aground because of a captain… — Lisa Murkowski Copy Share Image
Reality: "If we can sue the gun manufacturers for human actions, does this mean we can sue the car manufacturers for being… — Gary Kleck Copy Share Image
If I was drunk, I wouldn’t be here at all. And really, this is pretty good for four White Russians.” “White what?”… — Richelle Mead Copy Share Image
My idol is Emile Zola. He was a man of the left, so people expected of him a kind of 'Les Miserables,'… — Tom Wolfe Copy Share Image
Of all my prosecutorsnot one is my peer, but each and all are my political sovereigns; and had your honor submitted my… — Susan B. Anthony Copy Share Image
Your life changes. Everything has to be done perfectly, and I didn't follow that. I lived my life as if I wasn't… — Shannen Doherty Copy Share Image
“...drunk enough on earth's liquors to relish the prospect of the knife.” — Iain Sinclair Copy Share Image
I am as drunk as a lord, but then, I am one, so what does it matter ? — Bertrand Russell Copy Share Image
I've been drunk only once in my life. But that lasted for twenty-three years. — W. C. Fields Copy Share Image
“Dean Walker, my brother. The man that's well on his way to earning the proud title of town drunk.” — Melyssa Winchester Copy Share Image
“Let's go have lotsa drunk sex before it hits." "'Kay. Drunk sex for everybody!” — Nora Roberts Copy Share Image
Be drunk with Love, for Love is all that exists. Where is intimacy found if not in the give and take of… — Rumi Copy Share Image
If you think 'loading the dishwasher' means 'getting your wife drunk', you might be a redneck — Jeff Foxworthy Copy Share Image
“There’s no better way for a woman to punish a man than to make him sleep away from her.” — Steven Ramirez Copy Share Image
“Oh my God. I'm not Keith Richards. I'm Otis from Mayberry! A fucking drunk!” — Dave Mustaine Copy Share Image
When your companions get drunk and fight, take up your hat and wish them good night — Proverb Copy Share Image
Hey I have waited so long, to gather up my courage she has got me love drunk fumbling my words. — JLS Copy Share Image
He had the look of one who had drunk the cup of life and found a dead beetle at the bottom. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
The spirit he has shown has been second to none. (on Terry Fenwick's drunk-driving charge) — Terry Venables Copy Share Image
One reason I dont drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time. — Anonymous Copy Share Image
Here's how you know that you're really drunk: when you get into a taxi cab and you think the fare is the… — Dane Cook Copy Share Image
