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Death Quotes by Woody Allen

51 Death quotes by Woody Allen

All Death quotes Woody Allen’s page

Woody Allen jokes that death can be as easy as lying down, and he even says he’d rather avoid it by not dying. He treats death like a cheap bill, a way to cut expenses, and he mixes that with sharp political satire about defending rights with baseball bats.

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I can't do anything to death, doctor's orders.

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Marriage is the death of hope.

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I prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.

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Death is an acquired trait.

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Life's hard, then you die.

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If God exists, I hope he has a good excuse.

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What do I dislike about death? Must be the hours.

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I foresee death by culture shock.

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Don't think of death as an ending. Think of it as a really effective way of cutting down your expenses.

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“I don't want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying.”

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I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

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Dying is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down.

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I don't want to be immortal through my works. I want to be immortal by not dying.

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I don't want to live forever through my work. I want to live forever by not dying.

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There are worse things than death. Many of them playing at a theater near you.

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The chief problem about death ... is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought.

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Sex and death. Two things that come but once in my lifetime, but at least after death you're not nauseous.

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Death is one of the few things that can be done as easily lying down. The difference between sex and death is…

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People say that death is a part of life and there must be something to it, but I just see it as…

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“So then, what do you believe in? Sex and death. Two things that come once in my lifetime. But at least after…

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“Death doesn't really worry me that much, I'm not frightened about it... I just don't want to be there when it happens.”

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Some people want to achieve immortality through their works or their descendants. I prefer to achieve immortality by not dying.

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I don't want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying. I don't want to live…

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The difference between sex and death is that with death you can do it alone and no one is going to make…

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I think Bergman's films have eternal relevance, because they deal with the difficulty of personal relationships and lack of communication between people…

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There will be no major solution to the suffering of humanity until we reach some understanding of who we are, what the…

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The important thing, I think, is not to be bitter. You know, if it turns out that there is a God, I…

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The chief problem about death, incidentally, is the fear that there may be no afterlife - a depressing thought, particularly for those…

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They were doing the Dying Swan at the ballet. And there was a rumor that some bookmarkers had drifted into town from…

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“One day about a month ago, I really hit bottom. You know, I just felt that in a Godless universe, I didn't…

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“All men fear death. It’s a natural fear that consumes us all. We fear death because we feel that we haven’t loved…

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“On the plus side, death is one of the few things that can be done just as easily as lying down.”

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The difference between sex and death is, death you can do alone and nobody laughs at you.

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I'm not afriad of death I just don't want to be there when it happens

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There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?

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My relationship with death remains the same - I'm strongly against it.

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I don't fear death. - I just don't want to be around when it happens.

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I wouldn't mind dying so much if it wasn't that I would be dead at the end of it.

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I dont want to achieve immortality through my work ¦ I want to achieve immortality through not dying.

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What is it about death that bothers me? Probably the hours.

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The food here is terrible, and the portions are too small.

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What has gotten into you lately? Save a little craziness for menopause!

I enjoy the making of the film and it's something for me to do. If nobody ever comes to my films, if people don't…

Why does man kill? He kills for food. And not only food: frequently there must be a beverage.

A stockbroker is someone who invests other people's money until it is all gone.

Man cannot live by bread alone. Every once in awhile he needs a salad.

All literature is a footnote to Faust. I have no idea what I mean by that.

There are two important things in the world, the first is sex. The other isn't all that important.

You can't ride two horses with one behind.

Is old age really so terrible? Not if you've brushed your teeth faithfully.