“Some of my stuff’s so ugly, a little water damage could only help. Might” — Graham Parke Damage Copy Share Image
“made me sound like a twelve-year-old girl with pee running down her leg.” — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“what Warren was playing seemed to be a mixture of craps and table tennis.” — Graham Parke Football Copy Share Image
“In all these years, I’ve never seen you smile so often. Are you mentally ill?” — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“I’d urge you to stay away from any and all martial arts practitioners for the time being.” — Graham Parke Art Copy Share Image
“You’re stuck with yourself for the rest of your life, and now you know, beyond a doubt, that you’re an asshole.” — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“I didn't want to do it,' Kiala said. 'The universe just kind of conspired to force me to make a fool of… — Graham Parke Fool Copy Share Image
“stating the cause of death to be completely natural and, if possible, even somewhat pleasant.” — Graham Parke Death Copy Share Image
“My dad gave her the finger, went down to town hall, and took the name of the person in line ahead of… — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“I'm not sure my belly button is exactly in the middle. I wonder what that means..” — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“Instead of heading for a big mental breakdown, I decided to have a small breakdown every Tuesday evening.” — Graham Parke Breakdown Copy Share Image
“The stalker, meanwhile, stepped into the road. Didn’t even check for traffic. There wasn’t any, but something told me this was lucky… — Graham Parke Comedy Copy Share Image
“standing in front of a building, then not meeting up with a woman, but instead following her home at a distance, that’d… — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“It's finally happened; scientists claim to have discovered the very first person in history who doesn't like french fries. Just imagine the… — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“Want to pick up that check, honey? And I’d say; Nope, why don’t you pick up that check and add another fifty… — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“Passed the kitchen and noticed the sandwich. It still had huge chunks of moist, tender chicken breast in it. Didn’t want to… — Graham Parke Food Copy Share Image
“I shouted the perfect words to scare him off. It was just the delivery (and only the delivery) that made me sound… — Graham Parke Comedy Copy Share Image
“Theorized about the possibilities of solving a 500 piece puzzle in one go, simply by taking the pieces from the box in… — Graham Parke Puzzle Copy Share Image
“not knowing what kind of drugs you’re on and thus not knowing what to expect as effects or side effects, is that… — Graham Parke Drugs Copy Share Image
“We played for about half an hour before I realized we were actually playing two different games. What I’d thought of as… — Graham Parke Humor Copy Share Image
“Factor 40. It’s like rubber cement. It’ll take me a good twenty-five minutes to grind this stuff into her skin. I shudder… — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“Dug up a die and threw it 72 times. Aimed to get as high a total as possible. Tallied the throws knowing… — Graham Parke Time Copy Share Image
“Effectively feeling himself dry out and expire over a period of days.” — Graham Parke Expire Copy Share Image
“I was good at creeping around people’s backyards, at night, unseen.” — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“I must’ve been stone-cold sexy this whole time without even realizing.” — Graham Parke Copy Share Image
“When I tried to give my half-eaten ice cream to another child, I ran into the first problem of the day.” — Graham Parke Children Copy Share Image
“If that’s the case, then maybe you should be looking at people who wanted him dead, not people who needed him to… — Graham Parke Dead people Copy Share Image
