That punt was higher than Marion Berry on a fact-finding tour of Cartagena. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
How many of those dead animals you see on the highway are suicides? — Dennis Miller Animal Copy Share Image
American's could be any more self absorbed if they were made of equal parts water and paper towel. — Dennis Miller America Copy Share Image
We need anything politically important rationed out like Pez: small, sweet, and coming out of a funny, plastic head. — Dennis Miller Coming out Copy Share Image
Nowadays, with history not being taught anymore in American public schools, self-esteem is taking its place. — Dennis Miller Esteem Copy Share Image
Some people like to travel by train because it combines the slowness of a car with the cramped public exposure of an… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
We've got Nancy Pelosi. She never shuts up. It's just occasionally we have to hood her like a falcon so we can… — Dennis Miller Falcon Copy Share Image
Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
Joan Rivers telling Lauren Bacall her dress is all wrong is like Carrot Top telling Lenny Bruce he needs to get an… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
Parenting is the easiest job to get - you just have to screw up once and it's yours. — Dennis Miller Child Copy Share Image
I'm sorry, those pictures from the Abu Ghraib. At first, they, like infuriated me, I was sad. Then like, a couple days… — Dennis Miller Abu ghraib Copy Share Image
That kid's got an arm like Uncle Fester at an exhibition of Pre-Colombian... um, Christ, I lost it. I was going for… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
And I know your next move, I watch you so much, 'There's been no proven link between the secular state of Iraq… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
I find it shocking that anybody can be brought down in D.C. for gossip, ostensibly. I thought that was the coin of… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
I've changed after 9/11. My friends are still my friends.Bill Maher is my friend. I don't agree with a lot of what… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
I come from that earlier time in America when palm pilot was a nickname you recieved upon entering puberty! I was more… — Dennis Miller America Copy Share Image
Lotto fever hit New York again this week, and like the old saying goes, 'You gotta be in it to win it'...… — Dennis Miller Chance Copy Share Image
If some unemployed punk in New Jersey, can get a cassette to make love to Elle McPherson for $19.95, this virtual reality… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
I don't know what I think of George W. Bush when he first got in, but I've grown fond of the man,… — Dennis Miller Care Copy Share Image
The good thing about Pittsburgh, it's a good place to be raised... it doesn't tolerate assholes. You're either a good guy or… — Dennis Miller Bad guy Copy Share Image
America was founded by puritans and like it or not the anti-pleasure dogma of those buckled-shoed killjoys still pervades our collective unconscious… — Dennis Miller America Copy Share Image
Only man is a narcissistic enough species to think that a highly evolved alien life force would travel across billions and billions… — Dennis Miller Alien Copy Share Image
I've always loved the flirtatious tango of consonants and vowels, the sturdy dependability of nouns and capricious whimsy of verbs, the strutting… — Dennis Miller Flirtatious Copy Share Image
My fear of flying starts as soon as I buckle myself in and then the guy up front mumbles a few unintelligible… — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
There's a lot of differing data [about global warming], but as far as I can gather, over the last hundred years the… — Dennis Miller Climate Copy Share Image
At some point you cannot be the kid in the glass bubble in this world. You might've heard throughout your grade school… — Dennis Miller Brutal Copy Share Image
Ah, Feminism in the nineties, what a What is yours what is mine field. — Dennis Miller Feminism Copy Share Image
Two wrongs may not make a right, but a thousand wrongs make a writer. — Dennis Miller Copy Share Image
![“There's a lot of differing data [about global warming], but as far as I can gather, over the last hundred years the temperature on this planet has gone up 1.8 degrees. Am I the only one who finds that amazingly stable? I could go back to my hotel room tonight and futz with the thermostat for three…” quote by Dennis Miller](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/c11/dennis-miller-1315_climate_there-s-a-lot-of-differing-data-about-gl_140331.jpg)
