Isn't that what you really want in a jean? The ability to kick people in the face in them? I don't wanna… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
People don't understand that we're not warriors in their cause. We're a group of people that really feel that they want to… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Everybody thought Barack Obama was going to [inspire people] when he came to Washington, but, you know, the Senate seems like the… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
And then you've got Lieberman, who is for the war. And thinks the tax cuts could really help. He's basically for people… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I don't think, if anything, I don't think it's a feeling of hopelessness that people feel. I think if they feel -… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Most world religions denounced war as a barbaric waste of human life. We treasured the teachings of these religions so dearly that… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
One of the things that I do think government counts on is that people are busy. And it's very difficult to mobilize… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
To the people who are upset about their hard-earned tax money going to things they don’t like: welcome to the f*cking club.… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
President Bush announced his new economic plan. The centerpiece was a proposed repeal of the dividend tax on stocks, a boon that… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
All in all it's a pretty great day for major league sports. At long last they've decided that gay people are fit… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Michael Brown, the director of FEMA, was nominated by President Bush in 2003 and plans to start the job any day now.… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I feel like the only thing that I can do, and I've been fired from enough jobs, that I'm pretty confident in… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
If you want, you can try and get a broader perspective, or you can find people who are absolutely out of their… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The conversation that the Senate and the House are having with the President [Barack Obama] was very similar to the conversation that… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
People always say, when did you realize you were funny? And I think it's not that you realize you were funny. It's… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
You think that sense of humor goes as far as our ideology. I think that ultimately, we have we have very interesting… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I think people are used to people in show business having a lot of hubris. I think I have a normal amount… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
It's a travesty that people have forced someone who is gay to have to make their case that they deserve the same… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I don't particularly enjoy those types of interviews, because I have a great respect for Senator McCain, and I hate the idea… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Corporations are the only reason the tax code is so complicated in the first place. Those off-shore loopholes didn't get carved out… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Gay people can't be proud of the country and want to defend it too. What's the army afraid is going to happen… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
If you're going to give people 20 minutes of news satire, you've also got to give them Tiffani-Amber Thiessen or you're going… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
There is no such thing as an impartial jury because there are no impartial people. There are people that argue on the… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
High school. You know, people say, 'I'll never do so-and-so again' - then they do it. So what? Sometimes somebody has crack,… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The reason I don’t worry about society is, nineteen people knocked down two buildings and killed thousands. Hundreds of people ran into… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Songwriting is the way of perpetual want. Songwriters are the blessed/cursed people. You will never have a moment's peace in your life.… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I have great respect for people who are in the front lines and the trenches of trying to enact social change. I… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The United States Central Command of the Armed Forces has asked Geraldo Rivera to leave Iraq. It should also be noted that… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Maybe we should always show pictures. Bin Laden, pictures of our wounded service people, pictures of maimed innocent civilians. We can only… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The Jews celebrate Passover by eating unpalatable food to remind them what will happen to their people if they ever leave New… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The wisdom of the masses is not always wise. You could put a lot of things to a vote-you could have put… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
People would like to place a standard on our show that doesn't exist. We're not set up for reporting; we don't have… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The overwhelming condemnation makes it clear we have made enormous progress in teaching everyone that racism is bad. Where we seem to… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Some people have criticized the United States and the United States military for guarding oil fields and not guarding the Iraqi National… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
Nobody cares that Mitt Romney is rich. It's Romney's inability to understand the institutional advantage that he gains from the government’s tax… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The frustration of our [The Daily] show is- very much outside any parameters of the media or the government. We don't have… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I'll tell you this: Religion is far more of a choice than homosexuality. And the protections that we have, for religion -we… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
The building housing America's military brass is a five-sided pentagon, but somehow, the people in it still manage to make it the… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I have to say, as someone who is not a Christian, it’s hard for me to believe Christians are a persecuted people… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
It's very hard to feel the difficulties that the military goes through. It's very hard to feel the difficulties of military families,… — Jon Stewart Copy Share Image
I don't know how people feel,that's the beauty of TV, is they can see us, but we can't see them. — Jon Stewart Copy Share
I reject the idea there are just two sides. I think that with the amount of ideas and thoughts there are, it's not even… — Jon Stewart Copy Share
Megachurches. I can't be the only one frightened when our houses of worship sound like they could take on Godzilla. — Jon Stewart Copy Share
While opponents label (Howard) Dean a throwback liberal, The New York Times recently noted that as governor, Dean cut income taxes, reformed welfare and… — Jon Stewart Copy Share
You just have to keep trying to do good work, and hope that it leads to more good work. I want to look back… — Jon Stewart Copy Share
You know, in Saudi Arabia, you're innocent until proven Jewish. Female. Guilty! They're guilty! — Jon Stewart Copy Share
The unfortunate, yet truly exciting thing about your life, is that there is no core curriculum. The entire place is an elective. — Jon Stewart Copy Share
Christmas and the New Year are actually two holidays. So there is a plural, which in the English language, necessitates the use of 's.'… — Jon Stewart Copy Share
We're going to do a challenge. I'm going to try and download every movie ever made and you are going to try to sign… — Jon Stewart Copy Share
Our culture is just a series of checks and balances. The whole idea that we're in a battle between tyranny and freedom - it's… — Jon Stewart Copy Share
For me it was just exciting to see fake news catching on like that. We don't you know, it's interesting. I think we don't… — Jon Stewart Copy Share
![“Everybody thought Barack Obama was going to [inspire people] when he came to Washington, but, you know, the Senate seems like the place where smart people go to die.” quote by Jon Stewart](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/5ff/jon-stewart-455_barack_everybody-thought-barack-obama-was-going_738803.jpg)
![“The conversation that the Senate and the House are having with the President [Barack Obama] was very similar to the conversation that [John] McCain and I were having, which was two people talking over each other and nobody really addressing the underlying issues of what kind of country do we want…” quote by Jon Stewart](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/5c0/jon-stewart-455_barack_the-conversation-that-the-senate-and-the_3000209.jpg)
![“The frustration of our [The Daily] show is- very much outside any parameters of the media or the government. We don't have access to these people, we don't have access. We don't go to dinners we don't have cocktail parties. We don't you know, you've seen what happens when one of us ends up at the…” quote by Jon Stewart](https://sms4smile.com/q/img-quotes/2cc/jon-stewart-455_access_the-frustration-of-our-the-daily-show-is_3100466.jpg)
