Wife SMS / Text Messages

Husband aur Wife Hotel
me gaye tabhi 1 Lady ne Hello kiya,
Wife nay pocha,"Koun Thi Wo?"
Husband:-Tum dimagh kharab mat karo,
main pehle hi pareshan hun k woh bhi Yehi pochay gi.

3 Movie tickets

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (67 votes, average: 3.85 out of 5)
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Husband: Today is sunday &
I have to enjoy it.

So i bought 3 movie tickets.

Wife: Why three?

Husband: 1 For U and 2 for ur parents.

Husband at the bank

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (66 votes, average: 3.94 out of 5)
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Wife called her husband
Wife: honey where are you?
Husband: I'm at the bank.
Wife: dear, please I need 3000 rupees to activate my blackberry,
5000 to do my hair and
10,000 to buy a dress.
Husband: sorry, I meant I was at the "bank" of a river.
Do you want fish to cook?

Wife: If I die what will u do?

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (44 votes, average: 3.30 out of 5)
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Wife: If I die what will u do?
Husband: Main paagal ho jaun ga!

Wife: Will u marry again after I die?
Husband: Pagal kuch bhi kar sakta hai

One million copies of a new book sold

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (113 votes, average: 3.80 out of 5)
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One million copies of a new book sold
In just 2 days due to typing error of 1 alphabet in title.

"An idea,that can change ur wife''
While real word was(life).

Difference between wife & saali

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (115 votes, average: 3.81 out of 5)
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What is the difference between wife & saali?

Saali is Beauty,
Wife is duy,

Saali is passion,
Wife is tension,

Saali is patakha,
Wife is sayapa,

Saali is cool,
Wife is fool,

Saali is tuty-fruity,
Wife is qismat futi,

Saali is fresh cake,
Wife is earth quake...:p

A man / woman speaks

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (278 votes, average: 4.05 out of 5)
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As per research

A man speaks 25,000 words daily
&
A woman speaks 30,000

Problem starts when husband comes home
from office after consuming his 25,000 words
&
wife starts her 30,000..

Dream of receiving jewelry & cloths

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (70 votes, average: 4.13 out of 5)
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Wife: yesterday-night I saw a dream
That u were sending me
Jewelry and clothes!
Husband: yeah, I saw
your dad paying the bill !!!

Your husband needs rest

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (76 votes, average: 3.88 out of 5)
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Doctor:Madam, your husband needs rest
and pease so here are some sleeping pills.

Wife: Doc, when should I give them to him?
Doctor:They are for you.!!

Want to win or to be happy?

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (205 votes, average: 3.80 out of 5)
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A Husband & Wife Were
Arguing Over Some Issue.
After Much Of Discussion,
Wife Finally Said:
"Tell Me Dear ,
Do You Want To Win
OR
Do You Want To Be Happy . . ?

Argument Ended

Wife: Nonsense it's only a matter of patience

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (98 votes, average: 3.89 out of 5)
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Husband:u will never succeed
in making that dog obey u!
Wife:Nonsense it's only a matter of patience,
I had a lot of trouble with u at first.

Stupid and beautiful at same time

1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (182 votes, average: 3.95 out of 5)
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A Husband said to his wife One day

"I don't know how you can be so stupid
&
so beautiful all at the same time"

The wife responded ,
"Allow me to explain,
God made me beautiful
so you would be attracted to me ;

God made me stupid
so I would be attracted to you !"