A famous inspirational speaker said:
"Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn't my wife"
Audience was in shock and silence..
He added: "she was my mother"
A big round of applause & laughter!

A very daring husbnd tried to crack this at home
After a dinner, he said loudly to his wife in the kitchen:
"Best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman, who wasn't my wife"
standing for a moment, trying to recall the second line of that speaker

by the time he gained his senses,
he was on a hospital bed,
recovering from burns of boiling water!

Moral: don't copy if u can't paste!

Want to surprise your girlfriend?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Introduce her to your wife :p

In newyork, a man was watching a movie at home
and suddenly shouts nooooooooooooo!! :'(
Don't go inside the church its a trap!!

Wife: what are u watching?

Man: our wedding DVD :p

Asian man will have a wife and a girlfriend
and will love his wife more.

A black man will have 2 wives and 5 girlfriends
and will love his 1st wife more.

A white man will have 1 wife and 3 girlfriends
and will love his girlfriends more.

An pakistani man will have 1 wife and 4 girlfriends
and he still loves his mummy more.

When a married man says:
"I'll think about it" ,
What he really means that,
He doesn't know his wife's opinion yet... =p =d

If men behave after marriage the way they do before it,
half the divorces won't take place..

On the other hand,

If women behave before marriage the way they do after it,
half the marriages won't take place ;)

If you were my husband,
I would poison your coffee

If you were my wife
I would drink it.

Wife comes home late at night
and quietly opens the door to her bedroom.

From under the blanket
she sees four legs instead of two!

She reaches for a baseball bat
and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.

Once she's done,
she goes to the kitchen to have a drink.

As she enters,
she sees her husband there, reading a magazine. :s

"hi darling", he says,
"your parents have come to visit us,
so I let them stay in our bedroom.
Hope you have said hello to them.