Baptists Quote by Kinky Friedman

“The trouble with Texas Baptists is that we do not hold them under water long enough.”

— William Brann

Baptists are only funny underwater.

— Neil Simon

“as a member in good standing of The First Church of Nothing in Particular, I had no grudge against the Baptists. The only religions…

— Stephen King

“What were they?” “Baptists. They had a stronghold in the Blue Hills. They smoked them out.” “Praise be.” Sometimes I wish she would just…

— Margaret Atwood

I’d heard about the Baptists from Jacob Henry’s mother. According to her, Baptists were a strange lot. They put you in water to see…

— Robert Newton Peck

“I was a southern girl. We were all born to go to heaven, even if it was the last place I belonged.”

— Alessandra Torre

“The Baptist teaching that all are equal in the sight of God seemed to run right up against the notion that any human being…

— Andrew Himes

“Link ran his hands over his hair nervously. “Dude, my mom’s a Baptist. You think she’s gonna let me stay in the house when…

— Kami Garcia

“Truely was a Mississippi boy still. He didn't have a thing against religion, especially in the gentle hands of somebody like his daddy--or his…

— Nanci Kincaid

“Too many Christians are no longer fishers of men, but the keepers of the aquarium.”

— Paul Harvey

“...you can't put nothing past these southern boys. They just sit around waiting for somebody to kill their brother so they can get started…

— Alden Bell

“Jesus is offering you a lifeboat, but you would rather swim. Are you tired of swimming yet?”

— Jill Ammon Vanderwood