Feeling terrible Quote by John Bradshaw
““When Herkamer tells her he hates her, she cries, telling him that maybe someday she won’t be home when he wants her. Poor Herkamer is devastated. His abandonment, terror and separation anxiety are triggered. He rushes to his mom, feeling terrible guilt. His awareness of his anger is completely lost. His anger has been converted into guilt.””
About This Quote
Source Book: “Healing the Shame that Binds You”, 1988
When a partner’s rejection triggers deep fear, the person may shift from anger to guilt, losing awareness of their own emotions.
In simple terms: Rejection can turn anger into guilt, hiding true feelings.
Key Takeaway
Recognize and process anger before it becomes guilt.
Themes
relationships
emotional health
rejection
guilt
Mood
introspective
empathetic
Type
therapeutic
educational
When to use this quote
- partner conflict
- therapy sessions
- personal reflection
Key Concepts
attachment theory
emotional regulation
Questions to Reflect On
- How do you differentiate anger from guilt?
- What steps help you reclaim emotional awareness?
A Different Perspective
Guilt can mask underlying anger, hindering healing.
![“Right Understanding means feeling terrible, remembering pain is finite, and taking some solace from that remembering. And, when things are pleasant, even splendidly pleasant, remembering impermanence doesn't diminish the experience--it enhances it [p. 33]” quote by Sylvia Boorstein](https://sms4smile.com/quotes/img-quotes/adf/sylvia-boorstein-7241_feeling-terrible_right-understanding-means-feeling-terrib_876750.jpg)