"The fun of working on the road means……" — Joan Rivers
"The fun of working on the road means stealing from hotels. I've been doing it for so long, I have a set of towels from the Ark."
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Joan Rivers
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245 Quotes by Joan Rivers
Joan Rivers has 245 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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I was dating a transvestite, and my mother said, 'Marry him. You'll double your wardrobe.'
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I'm so fat and I'm so depressed; last night I tried to hang myself - but the rope broke.
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We don't apologize for a joke. We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don't get…
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Grandchildren can be annoying - how many times can you go: "And the cow goes moo and the pig goes…
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Anger is a symptom, a way of cloaking and expressing feelings too awful to experience directly - hurt, bitterness, grief…
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I wish I could tell you it gets better. It doesn't get better. YOU get better.
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Age - it's the one mountain you can't overcome.
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I'm no cook. When I want lemon on chicken, I spray it with Pledge.
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At my age an affair of the heart is a bypass!
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A child can be taught not to do certain things, such as touch a hot stove, pull lamps off of…
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My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese; most of it's missing, and what's there stinks.
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I must admit I am nervous about getting Alzheimer's. Once it hits, I might tell my best joke and never…
See all 245 quotes by Joan Rivers »
More Ark Quotes
This quote is filed under Ark Quotes,
one of 90 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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There is but one Church in which men find salvation, just as outside the ark of Noah it was not…
— Thomas Aquinas
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Every one of our children will be brought into the ark, if we pray and work earnestly for them.
— Dwight L. Moody
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Have a great love for Jesus in his divine Sacrament of Love; that is the divine oasis of the desert.…
— Peter Julian Eymard
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When the polar ice caps melt, my recording studio will rise up like an ark, and I'll float off into…
— Thomas Dolby
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We Americans are the peculiar, chosen people - the Israel of our time; we bear the ark of the liberties…
— Herman Melville
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Don't touch the ark of God! It is the God of Israel who is wounding people with regards to their…
— Paul Washer
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The elective franchise, if guarded as the ark of our safety, will peaceably dissipate all combinations to subvert a Constitution,…
— Thomas Jefferson
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The genius of capitalism consists precisely in its lack of morality. Unless he is rich enough to hire his own…
— Lewis H. Lapham
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Plan ahead: It wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.
— Richard Cushing
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If I could work with Joan Van Ark every day for the rest of my life I would.
— Ted Shackelford
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If zoos are like arks, then rare animals are like passengers on a voyage of the damned, never to find…
— Peter Singer
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I always liked the story of Noah's Ark and the idea of starting anew by rescuing the things you like…
— Zach Braff
See all 90 Ark Quotes »