"If you choke a Smurf, what color does…" — Jeff Dunham
"If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?"
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Jeff Dunham
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26 Quotes by Jeff Dunham
Jeff Dunham has 26 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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As humans we like to laugh at our fears, we like to whistle in the dark.
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A comedian needs to have his own filters, needs to know his audience, how far he can push things.
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Stand-up comedy is tough right now. Anybody can come to a concert, tape you, and put you up on the…
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But the mechanics of learning to 'throw your voice' are pretty simple. Anyone with a tongue, an upper palate, teeth,…
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I've always said that instead of watching a guy juggle seven things amazingly I would rather see a really bad…
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I used to pick Priuses out of the grill of my Hummer.
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When I was eight years old, I got a dummy for Christmas and started teaching myself. I got books and…
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I've skewered whites, blacks, Hispanics, Christians, Jews, Muslims, gays, straights, rednecks, addicts, the elderly, and my wife. As a standup…
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I try to make the majority of my audience laugh. That's my audience. They'll laugh at the dead terrorist.
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I'm a geek to the bone.
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Growing up doing those Kiwanis Clubs, doing those Cub Scout banquets, doing those church shows, I learned to find that…
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I had a happy, dramafree youth, growing up in an upper-middle-class neighborhood in Dallas, Texas. The only thing that was…
See all 26 quotes by Jeff Dunham »
More Choke Quotes
This quote is filed under Choke Quotes,
one of 296 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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I don't care who you are, you're going to choke in certain matches. You get to a point where your…
— Arthur Ashe
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There are people who would rather choke than go see my movies. They write me letters all the time.
— Alec Baldwin
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I almost choke on my popcorn when I hear film stars, who walk on red carpets as much as the…
— Julie Burchill
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My life has been one great big joke, a dance that's walked a song that's spoke, I laugh so hard…
— Maya Angelou
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If you're choking in a restaurant you can just say the magic words, 'Heimlich maneuver,' and all will be well.…
— Eddie Izzard
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That community is already in the process of dissolution where each man begins to eye his neighbor as a possible…
— Learned Hand
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Nowadays not even a suicide kills himself in desperation. Before taking the step he deliberates so long and so carefully…
— Soren Kierkegaard
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We all choke, and the man who says he doesn't choke is lying like hell.
— Lee Trevino
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He who owns a wood of proper land in this country, and, in the face of all the personal riches…
— Andrew Jackson Downing
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From the heart of this fountain of delights wells up some bitter taste to choke them even amid the flowers.
— Lucretius
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If one holds these high principles clearly before one's eyes, and compares them with the life and spirit of our…
— Albert Einstein
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Ods me I marle what pleasure or felicity they have in taking their roguish tobacco. It is good for nothing…
— Ben Jonson
See all 296 Choke Quotes »