"If someone told me it wasn't "fashionable" to……" — Jack Handey
"If someone told me it wasn't "fashionable" to talk about freedom, I think I'd just have to look him square in the eye and say, "Okay, YOU TELL ME what's 'fashionable'." But he won't. And you know why? Because you can't ask someone what's fashionable in a smart-alecky way like that. You have to be friendly and say, "By the way, what's fashionable?""
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Jack Handey
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397 Quotes by Jack Handey
Jack Handey has 397 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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If any man says he hates war more than I do, he better have a knife, that's all I have…
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I hope that after I die, people will say of me: 'That guy sure owed me a lot of money.'
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People think it would be fun to be a bird because you could fly. But they forget the negative side,…
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The face of a child can say it all, especially the mouth part of the face.
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I guess of all my uncles, I liked Uncle Caveman the best. We called him Uncle Caveman because he lived…
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If I could be a bird, I'd be a Flying Purple People Eater, because then people would sing about me…
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Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's…
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What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds singing and the wind rustling through the leaves, that…
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Not screaming in terror like his passengers.
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Somebody told me it was frightening how much topsoil we are losing each year, but I told that story around…
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MEMORIES OF MY FAMILY MEETINGS still are a source of strength to me. I remember we'd all get into the…
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I BET WHEN NEANDERTHAL KIDS would make a snowman, someone would always end up saying, "Don't forget the thick heavy…
See all 397 quotes by Jack Handey »
More Ask Quotes
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Ask yourself the secret of your success. Listen to your answer, and practice it.
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If you have to ask what jazz is, you'll never know.
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I began wearing hats as a young lawyer because it helped me to establish my professional identity. Before that, whenever…
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To save your world you asked this man to die; would this man, could he see you now, ask why?
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Before people complain of the obscurity of modern poetry, they should first examine their consciences and ask themselves with how…
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If two friends ask you to judge a dispute, don't accept, because you will lose one friend; on the other…
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The Holy Spirit is our comforter, our teacher. That's why, in prayer, we can ask the Lord to open up…
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I'm not an actor that tends to care. I don't ask 'Is this a close up? Is this a master?…
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