"He's so full of alcohol, if you put……" — Groucho Marx
"He's so full of alcohol, if you put a lighted wick in his mouth he'd burn for three days."
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Groucho Marx
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287 Quotes by Groucho Marx
Groucho Marx has 287 quotes on this site.
A few more worth reading:
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Home is where you hang your head.
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No, Groucho is not my real name. I am breaking it in for a friend.
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How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them.
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Many years ago I chased a woman for almost two years, only to discover that her tastes were exactly like…
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Since my daughter is only half-Jewish, could she go in the water up to her knees?
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Send two dozen roses to Room 424 and put "Emily, I love you" on the back of the bill.
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Let there be dancing in the streets, drinking in the saloons, and necking in the parlor.
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As soon as I get through with you, you'll have a clear case for divorce and so will my wife.
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Dig trenches? With our men being killed off like flies? There isn't time to dig trenches. We'll have to buy…
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I know, I know - you're a woman who's had a lot of tough breaks. Well, we can clean and…
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I've been around so long, I knew Doris Day before she was a virgin.
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[Mrs. Teasdale]: He's had a change of heart. [Groucho]: A lot of good that'll do him. He's still got the…
See all 287 quotes by Groucho Marx »
More Alcohol Quotes
This quote is filed under Alcohol Quotes,
one of 1,156 quotes in that category. Here are a few more:
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It is best to rise from life as from a banquet, neither thirsty nor drunken.
— Aristotle
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On average, drug prisoners spend more time in federal prison than rapists, who often get out on early release because…
— Michael Badnarik
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Drug prohibition has caused gang warfare and other violent crimes by raising the prices of drugs so much that vicious…
— Michael Badnarik
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Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to…
— Dave Barry
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According to Teenage Research Unlimited, 51 percent of 13-15 year olds say they will be faced with making a decision…
— Xavier Becerra
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I have a total irreverence for anything connected with society except that which makes the roads safer, the beer stronger,…
— Brendan Behan
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Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with that it's compounding a felony.
— Robert Benchley
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I spent a lot of money on booze, birds and fast cars. The rest I just squandered.
— George Best
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
— Ambrose Bierce
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The problem with the world is that everyone is a few drinks behind.
— Humphrey Bogart
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Never accept a drink from a urologist.
— Erma Bombeck
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Wine is a treacherous friend who you must always be on guard for.
— Christian Nestell Bovee
See all 1,156 Alcohol Quotes »